You Might Be A Redneck... - Seasonal / Holiday jokes (57601)





 


What's the last thing you usually hear before a redneck dies?


'Hey y'all... Watch this!'





How To Pick Up A Chick In Arkansas:


Hey Baby! Nice tooth.





You Might Be A Redneck If...


You think the last three words of the national


anthem is 'start your engines.'





You Might Be A Redneck If...


Fifth grade was the best six years of your life.





You Might Be A Redneck If...


One of your kids was born on a pool table.





You Might Be A Redneck If...


If you refer to the fifth grade as, "your senior year".





You Might Be A Redneck If...


You think the stock market has fence around it.





You know yer a redneck when you take a load to the


dump and bring back more than you took.





You Might Be A Redneck If...


You've ever been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.





You Might Be A Redneck If...


Your grandfather died and left everything to his


widow... but she can't touch it 'til she's fourteen.





You Might Be A Redneck If...


The figurines on top your wedding cake were wearing overalls.





You Might Be A Redneck If...


Your favorite restaurant has a sawdust floor





You Might Be A Redneck If...


You've ever burped and killed a fly





You Might Be A Redneck If...


There were dogs in the church on your wedding day





You Might Be A Redneck If...


You're saving up to gravel your driveway.





You Might Be A Redneck If...


You've ever bought a used cap.





You Might Be A Redneck If...


You turn the sprinkler on and tell the kids


it's a water park.





You Might Be A Redneck If...


You've ever had to have a wrecker pull your car


out of a pothole in your driveway.





You Might Be A Redneck If...


Your wedding cake was made by Sarah Lee





You Might Be A Redneck If...


You've ever had a dream about beef jerky.





You Might Be A Redneck If...


Winn-Dixie catered your wedding.





You Might Be A Redneck If...


Your not actually able to read the Richard Petty Story,


but you sure like to look at the pictures.





You Might Be A Redneck If...


You've ever tried to pass an entire funeral procession.





You Might Be A Redneck If...


Your driving a vehicle with no original body parts.





You Might Be A Redneck If...


In preparation for a romantic evening, you stop by the


grocery store for a bottle of Mr. Bubble.





You Might Be A Redneck If...


The fireworks stand gives you a volume discount.