Top Rated Jokes

|Johnny: Daddy, are caterpillars good to eat?Father: Have I not told you never to mention such thing...

I've often wanted to drown my troubles, but i can't get my wife to go swimming!...

There was this punk who got on a bus. He sat next to an old man who started staring at him, because ...

You've a face like a million dollars.All green and wrinkled!...

A customer sent an order to a distributor for a large amount ofgoods totaling a great deal of money....

Can you repeat the part after "Listen very carefully"?...

A redhead, a brunette and a blonde all escape from a prison together. They run into the nearby w...

|Argument (ar*gyou*ment) n. A discussion that occurs when you're right, but he just hasn't realized ...

|Great truths about life that adults have learnedRaising teenagers is like nailing Jell-O to a tree....

What animal always goes to bed with its shoes on ? A horse !...

|Dear Santa:I rarely ask for much. This year is no exception. I don't need diamond earrings, handy s...

A vampire bat came flapping in from the night covered in fresh blood and parked himself on the roof ...

Everybody I know who has a dog usually calls him "Rover" or "Spot". I call mine Sex. Now, Sex has be...

An ant and an elephant share a night of romance. The next morning the ant wakes up and the elephant ...

A dog thinks: Hey, these people I live with feed me, love me, provide me with a nice warm, dry house...

Two rabbits were being chased by a pack of wolves. The wolves chased the rabbits into a thicket. Aft...

This horse walks in to a bar and asks for a bit to eat!...

A bear is chasing a rabbit through a forest. They find a bottle and decide to rub it. A genie pops o...

Q: Does an elephant ever forget?A: Only if you loan him money....

Q: Why don't elephants use cellular phones?A: So the rest of the world won't know their plans....

Q: Why do penguins live in the Arctic?A: Because they can't fly to Florida like the rest of the old ...

A blind man walks into a store with his seeing eye dog. All of a sudden, he picks up the leash and b...

A man goes into a bar with his dog. He goes up to the bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "...

Why did the raccoon cross the road? He didn't, he got hit by a car....

A blind man was out walking with his seeing eye dog when suddenly the animal paused and wet the man'...