Puns by the Pound! - General / Unsorted jokes (56034)





 


Q: what did the hurricane say to the coconut tree?


A: Hold on to your nuts, this ain't no ordinary blow-job...





Q: Did you hear about the queer burglar?


A: He couldn't blow the safe do he went down on the elevator...





Q: Why is it so groovy to be a test tube baby?


A: Because you get a womb with a view...





Q: Why are eggs so frusterated?


A: Because they only get laid once, they only get eaten once, and you've gotta boil them to get them hard...





Q: Where do you get virgin wool?


A: From ugly sheep...





Q: What did Adam say to Eve?


A: Stand back, I don't know how big this thing gets...





Q: Did you hear about the deaf gynecoligist?


A: He had to learn how to read ilps...





Q: Why are chickens so ugly?


A: You'd be ugly too if you had a pecker hanging out your forehead...





Q: Why do hummingbirds hum?


A: Cause they dont know the words...





Q: Where are an elephant's sex organs?


A: In his feet- if he steps on you you're fucked...





Q: How do you tell if a woman is wearing pantyhose?


A: If she farts, her ankles will swell...





Q: What's the ulitmate rejection?


A: When you're masturbating and your hand falls asleep...





Q: How do you know when an elephant's been fucking in your garage?


A: Your Hefty bags are missing...