elton john jokes

What do you get when you cross Mariah Carey and Elton John?Nothing. Elton John prefers men....

Why did Elton John wear a nicotine patch on his penis?



Because he was t...

Why did Elton John wear a nicotine patch on his penis?Because he was trying to cut down to one fag a...

What does Philip Christy and Elton John have in common? They both play the skin flute!!!...

What's the difference betwee Elton John and Princess Diana?One's composing, the other is decomposing...

MICHAEL KENNEDY What's the difference between John Denver and Michael Kennedy? John Denver made ...

Two British faggots were standing on Circular Quay looking out over the harbour. One of them pointed...

John asks his wife, Mary what she wants to celebrate their 40th wedding anniversary. "Would you ...

While they were taking up the collection, John leaned forward and said, "Hey, Marie, how about you a...

Two couples were playing cards. John accidentally dropped some cards on the floor. When he bent ...

Sam and John were out cutting wood, and John cut his arm off. Sam wrapped the
arm in a pl...

John and Marie (both unmarried) went to the same church. Marie went every Sunday and taught Sund...

John went to Dr. Smith because of intense migraine headaches.The doctor tried many things, but no re...

John went to Dr. Smith because of intense migraine headaches.



The docto...

John was a clerk in a small drugstore but he was not much of a salesman. He could never find the ite...

John: "I'm glad you named me John."Mother: "Why?"John: "Because that's what all the kids at school c...

Teacher:John how can you sleep in my class!



John:If you just shut up,maybe...

John was a clerk in a small drugstore but he was not much of a salesman. He could never find the...

John was a clerk in a small drugstore but he was not much of a salesman. He could never find the...

John asks his wife, Mary what she wants to celebrate their 40th wedding anniversary. "Would you ...

Knock Knock
Who's there?
John!
John who!
John the
Knock Knock
Who's there?
John...

Knock Knock
Who's there?
John!
John who?
John with
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Joh...

John gets a call from his blonde girlfriend, Buffy. "I've got a problem," says Buffy.

...

If Yoko Ono married Sonny Bono, she'd be Yoko Ono Bono.

If Dolly Parton married Sal...

John was a clerk in a small chemist shop but he was not much of a salesman. He could never find ...

A new bus driver was starting his route. It was a beautiful day, everything was going great - no...

"Bono, Yoko. Yoko, Bono"
"I'm sorry, but no one under 18 will be admitted unless they're B...

John receives a phone call. "Hello," he answers. The voiceon the ot other end says, "This is Susan. ...

A man goes golfing with his Friend, John. He arrives home several hours late.

His ...

One day little john came home with an F on his math test his dad asks

"How did you ge...

One fine day, a bus driver went to the bus garage, started his bus, and drove off along the rout...

One day this man named John was in a pet store and as he was looking he saw a parrot sitting on ...

A man who thought he was John the Baptist was disturbing the neighborhood, so for public safety, he ...

The Freudian Slip Ted and John are setting in the bar and John asked Ted if he bought the train ...

A man who thought he was John the Baptist was disturbing the neighborhood, so for public safety,...

John got very bad migraines. Incredibly bad. He would get sick and nauseous. After numerous t...

John kept pestering his parents to buy a video, but they said they couldn't afford one. So one d...

John and Mary visit their pastor for marriage counseling. The pastor gets up and hugs Mary, and sits...

John invited his mother over for dinner. During the meal, his mother couldn't help noticing how beau...

John and Claire are just newly married. They are still a little shy about doing the "wild thing", so...

Jill's car was unreliable and she called John for a ride every time it broke down. One day J...

John invited his mother over for dinner. During the meal, his mother couldn't help noticing how ...

John and Claire are just newly married. They are still a little shy about doing the "wild thing"...

John & Jessica were on their way home from the bar one night and John got pulled over by the p...

Two friends John and Dave were two huge baseball fans. Their entire lives, John and Dave talked ...

Arriving in HeavenThree men die and go to heaven and queue to meet St. Peter.

St. Peter: ...

John & Jessica were on their way home from the bar one night and John got pulled over by the pol...

|John and Jessica were on their way home from the bar one night and John got pulled over by the poli...

A man and his wife were about to get evicted and needed some quick cash. "honey, we may have to...

John invited his mother over for dinner one evening. During the meal, she couldn't help but notice h...