sport jokes

Q: What is the difference between Liverpool football and a tea bag? A: The tea bag stays in th...

Why were the two managers sitting around sketching crockery before the start of the game? It wa...

What part of a football pitch smells nicest? The scenter spot!...

What is the bank manager's favourite type of football? Fiver side!...

Why aren't football stadiums built in outer space? Because there is no atmosphere!...

Why is it that birds are quickly sold when they come up on the transfer market? They tend to go...

Q: How does Stan Collymore change a lightbulb? A: He holds it in the air, and the world revolves ...

Big Ron was caught speeding on his way to the City Ground today. "I'll do anything for 3 points...

What part of a football pitch smells nicest ? The scenter spot !...

Why were the two managers sitting around sketching crockery before the start of the game ? It w...

What is the bank manager's favourite type of football ? Fiver side !...

Q: What's the difference between David Beckham and an airplane model kit? A: One's a glueless ...

What is the most popular sport played by raindrops and hail stones? -Diving...

Why does someone who runs marathons make a good student? Because education pays off in the long...

How did the basketball court get wet? The players dribbled all over it!...

Why did the chicken get sent off? For persistent fowl play!...

Where do football directors go when they are fed up? The bored room!...

What is a Chihuahua's favorite sport? Miniature golf!...

How did the footbal pitch end up as triangle? Somebody took a corner!...

Why didn't the dog want to play football? It was a boxer!...

What did they call Dracula when he won the league? The champire!...

Why did the goal post get angry? Because the bar was rattled!...

What did the bumble bee striker say? Hive scored!...

How do hens encourage their football teams? They egg them on!...

If you have a referee in football, what do you have in bowls? Cornflakes!...

Ref: I'm sending you off Player: What for? Ref: The rest of the match!...

What does a footballer and a magician have in common? Both do hat tricks!...

Who won the race between two balls of string? They we're tied!...

Q: Four Dallas Cowboys in a car, who's driving? A: The police....

Golfer: "Do you think I can get there with a 5-iron?" Caddy: "Eventually."...

How did the footbal pitch end up as triangle ? Somebody took a corner !...

What does a footballer and a magician have in common ? Both do hat tricks !...

What did the bumble bee striker say ? Hive scored !...

If you have a referee in football, what do you have in bowls ? Cornflakes !...

How do hens encourage their football teams ? They egg them on !...

Why didn't the dog want to play football ? It was a boxer !...

Where do football directors go when they are fed up ? The bored room !...

Why did the goal post get angry ? Because the bar was rattled !...

Ref:I'm sending you off Player: What for ? Ref: The rest of the match !...

Why do artists never win when they play football ? They keep drawing !...

How do you stop squirrels playing football in the garden? Hide the ball, it drives them nuts!...

Tyson's psychologist told Mike to take a year off, he obviously misunderstood....good thing he d...

Q: How do the Dallas Cowboys spend their first week at spring training? A: Studying their Miran...

Golfer: "I've played so poorly all day; I think I'm going to go drown myself in that lake." Cad...

How do you stop squirrels playing football in the garden ? Hide the ball, it drives them nuts !...

What is a dog's favourite sport ? Formula 1 drooling !...

Where do old bowling balls end up? In the gutter!...

How does a physicist exercise? By pumping ion!...

What tea do footballers drink? Penaltea!...

Where do footballers dance? At a football!...