situations

A city boy was visiting the country and wanted to go hunting. The farmer lent the boy his gun, telli...

An infamous stud with a long list of conquests walked into his neighborhood bar and ordered a drink....

A cowboy walked into a barber shop, sat on the barber's chair and said, "I'll have a shave and a sho...

A circus owner walked into a bar to see everyone crowded about a table watching a little show. On th...

NASHVILLE, TN ? With sales of "God Bless The U.S.A." waning after a five-month surge, country si...

You must read this out loud to get the pronounciations right!


That's not rig...

A decorated war veteran, fresh off the bus, is looking for a place to stay. He hears that room and b...

The barber was finishing a haircut on a customer one dayand started to apply some 'Aftershave Lotion...

A man enters a barber shop for a shave. While the barber is foaming him up, he mentions the problems...

A business man from New York decided to quit his job and buy a 200 acre spread in Montana. One day w...

Seems that the traveling salesman was driving in the country and his car broke down. He hiked severa...

A woman who had been married twice and divorced twice was fed up. Her first husband beat her, and ...

While out one morning in the park, a jogger found a brandnew tennis ball. Seeing no one around that ...

A guy takes his greenhorn wife hunting on a ranch. When they reach their deer blinds, the guy says, ...

The new metro cop pulled a speeder who was zipping down Maple Avenue."Can I see your license and reg...

The other day my house caught fire. The insurance agent said, "Shouldn't be a problem. What kind of ...

One day, a diver was enjoying the aquatic world 20 feet below sea level. He noticed a guy at the sa...

Jones is checking out of a hotel when suddenly he hasto take a shit real bad.The toilet in his room ...

"What happened?" asked the hospital visitor of the heavily bandaged man sitting up in bed."Well, I w...

The newly divorced woman had never had to be the handyman around the house before, and quickly dis...

Paddy gets a phone call from Murphy. "Paddy," says Murphy, "I've got a problem.""What's the matter?...

A woman walks into a shop that sells very expensive Persian rugs. She looks around and spots the per...

The first time I went to a drug store to buy condoms, I was waited on by a beautiful young woman. Sh...

A woman gives birth to twins, a girl and a boy.Her husband isn't there, and she doesn't wantto name ...

The Mortitian arrived at the Mortuary one morning and wasaproached by his assistant."Anything intere...

Three college roommates -- two females and a male -- beganto argue after dinner about whose turn it ...

A little girl was playing up a tree near a church. The priest was takinga walk when he happened to l...

A man is walking past this house when a used condom comes flying out of the second story window and ...

Just after Lorenna Bobbitt brutally cut off her husband's penis, she jumped into her car and sped aw...

A cleaning woman was applying for a new position. When askedwhy had she left her previous employment...

[From Albert's wife Wilma, who claims it is true:]

One of the problems dealt with ...

A rookie police officer was assigned to ride in a cruiser with an experienced partner. A call came o...

A Cowboy riding down the trail encounters an Indian laying on the trail with hard on. The Cowboy ask...

A woman in the labor ward of the general hospital, legs spread wide, lets out a loud yell and out po...

Unable to attend the funeral after his father died, a son who lived far away called his brother and ...

From 'Operating System Concepts, 3rd Edition' by A. Silbershatz, J.
Peterson, and P. Galv...

A Texan bought a round of drinks for all in the bar and announced that his wife had just produced a ...

The new preacher had just begun his sermon. He was a little nervous, and about ten minutes into ...

Paul got off the elevator on the 40th floor and nervouslyknocked on his blind date's door. She opene...

A young woman stops into her local pharmacy to pick a supply of tampons for herself. She goes to the...

A group of third, fourth and fifth graders accompanied by two female teachers went on a field trip...

This guy comes home from work one day to find his dog with the neighbor's pet rabbit in his mouth. T...

A man was having problems with premature ejaculation so he decided to go to the doctor. He asked the...

Cronin goes to a barber shop to get his hair cut. The barber cuts his hair, and after he gets done, ...

A man walks into a bank and says he wants to borrow$200 for six months. The loan officer asks him wh...

A rather well proportioned young lady, Joan, spent almost all of her vacation sunbathing on the roof...

There's this little guy sitting inside a bar, just looking at his drink.He stays like that for half-...

The Young Man's Big Mouth A young man goes into a drug store to buy condoms. The pharmacist says ...

A new American ambassador was being entertained by an African diplomat.They'd spent the day discussi...

One day a lady went to the doctor's office and told the doctorthat her husband wasn't interested in ...