situations

Several short geology plays on words

Okay, if you are a real geologist, you probably enjo...

A woman went to the bar with a black eye."How'd ya get that?" asked the bartender."From my husband,"...

Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

How does the guy who dri...

A tipsy guy in a bar stood and made the following speech, "I am white from head to toe. I am rich an...

Upon returning to their car from a shopping tour, one of the young ladies realized that she had forg...

A man was wandering around a fairground and he happened to see afortune-teller's tent. Thinking it w...

Girl woke up in the morning after a party and found an Elephant in bedbeside her.She said "I must ha...

A divorced woman had been on her own for several months and wasstarting to get extremely horny. She ...

You might be a redneck if...
In tough situations you ask yourself, "What would Cu...

A man walks into a jewellers shop, unzips his trousers and placeshis tool upon the counter. The lady...

The Director of the Scottish Tartans Museum, Dr Michael MacDonaldwas in America. An old lady fixed h...

Two guys are out hunting deer. The first guy says, "Did you see that?" The second guy says, "No." "A...

A hunchback is running along a street being chased by a pack of children.He stops, turns around and ...

A man with a wooden eye was sitting at a bar one night.He glanced across the room and noticed a very...

What a rip-off. I went into our local bookstore and saw this huge display with a sign saying "Newl...

Two girls are sitting in a movie-theater. "That man beside me is fumbling his crotch", one whispers ...

Discovering too late that a watermelon spiked with vodka had accidentally been served to a luncheo...

In the midst of a veritable downpour, a gallant driver sawa woman alone in the mud trying to change ...

Two men were walking through the woods when a large bearwalked out into the clearing no more than 50...

"Miss Jones, we can't employ you as a model," the editor from themen's magazine explained. "It's too...

Joe has always had an uncontrollable twitch in hisleft eyelid since young. Fred has a splitting head...

Cop coming upon a young couple making out....Cop: What the hell are you two doing?Boy: See honey, I ...

Why is the word abbreviation so long?

How come you press harder on a remote-control when...

A stuffy matron is with a new man in a top restaurant. The onion soup getsto her, and as the waiter ...

This guy goes to sperm bank to give a sample. So the girl At the front desk says to him:"Thank you f...

I was walking down an alley last night, when I heard,"Help! Help!" coming from behind a dumpster. Tw...

Consider the following:Female guitar player shouting at her boyfriend in acrowded shopping mall: "Do...

A department store had to call off its special summer sale in August because of a conflict -- its Ch...

A man walked into the bar and there was a gorillasitting on a barstool.The man asked the bartender w...

Little Johnny's dad is sitting on the side of the bed rolling on acondom about to give his wife some...

Two men went to the desert for a vacation. They rented a camel and headed out. Five days later they ...

Imagine you`re in a room with no windows and no doors,how do you get out?Stop imagining!Sent by Call...

The middle aged secretary had never been married and had had enuff of work, as well as the single ...

A middle aged man, about 5 foot 8 inches tall, walks into a Walmartand asks where the pharmacy count...

A guy leaves his place at the bar to go have a piss. He comes back about10 Minutes later, sits down ...

I just thought these up:

"Death is like a box of chocolates, you never know what yo...

Two nuns go to a restaurant to have dinner. They notice RockyMountain Oysters on the menu and wonder...

A college professor's going to bed with his wife. He's not that tired, so he's gonna stay awake and ...

Stolen Car A man walks out of a bar, stumbling back and forth with a key in his hand. A cop on t...

Woman: Two *Achoo!* tickets, please. Clerk: Have you purchased tickets here before? Woman: *cough* N...

A man and a woman who have never met before find themselves in the same sleeping carriage of a train...

Prostitute walks into a bar and asks the bar man for two Bacardi's and coke. Bar man serves her and ...

The Lone Ranger and Tonto had been riding down the trailall day. When they had stopped to take a res...

A woman strode angrily into the large drug-store-cum-general-store, slapped a package on the counter...

A guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman. After an hour of gathering up his courage he final...

Farmer Petrovich is whipping and slapping his sheep when the localminister comes walking around the...

Two blokes were out walking home from work one afternoon."Shit," said the first bloke, "as soon as I...

The dentist was called away from the dinner table to take an urgent phone call. It was Mr. Tuckerman...

Barbie and G.I. Joe A little girl ...

A guy was attending a masquerade Halloween Ball, and dancing with a girl who was wearing a map of Te...