school jokes

The little boy comes home from school and asks mom, "Where do babies come from?" Not wanting to get ...

A Native American, who hung an eagle feather from her mortarboard at graduation, won't be gettin...

*** These are actual excuse notes teachers have received, spelling mistakes included. ***My son is u...

*** These are actual excuse notes teachers have received, spelling mistakes included. ***
<...

... A University of Georgia student was visiting a Yankee relative in Boston over the holidays. He w...

*My son is under a doctor's care today and should
not take P.E. today. Please execute him.*Pl...

Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half

New Vaccine May Contain Rabies

Man Minus ...

1. Dear School: Please excuse John from being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33.2. Plea...

Mother: What did you learn in school today Son: How to write Mother: What did you write? Son: ...

It's the way you say it...

A University of Georgia student was visiting a Yankee relative...

Mother: Come on, Victor, you have to get out of bed or you'll be late for school.
Victor: A...

1. Dear School: Please excuse John from being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33.

A school teacher injured his back and had to wear a plaster cast around the upper part of his bo...

Mat's dad picked him up from school to take him to a dental appointment. Knowing the parts for t...

A young teenager comes home from school and asks her mother, "Is it true what Rita just told me? Th...

These are excuse notes from parents (with their original spelling) collected by schools from all...

Little Tommy is at the zoo on a school visit and he spots a deer. Being a city kid he's never seen o...

A little kid's in school, taking a true-false test and he's flipping a coin. At the end of the...

A young jewish boy was doing very poorly in school, especially in mathematics. So, his father, a...

Johnny comes back from school crying and says, "Mommy all the kids in the school say I have...

A little boy was excited about his first day at school.So excited in fact, that only a few minutes a...

It was the first day of school, and the elementary school teacher was establishing the fact that...

Mum: From now on your going to have free school dinners. Son:But, Mum, I don't want three school ...

The new Ensign was assigned to subs, where he'd dreamed
of working since a young boy. He was ...

A friend in the US has forwarded me this set of rules of conduct for female teachers in 1915 (sc...

1. My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today.

Please execute h...

At school Little Johnny was told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret...

M.I.T.: "I had a nervous breakdown this weekend."
"Have some fries."

Caltech: "I had t...

Little Johnny came home after attending Sunday School at his church, and his mother asked him, "...

A seven-year-old turns up in his classroom one morning to be confronted by his
teacher.

The following is "rumored" to be a real news story.

LADUE ASSISTANT PRINCIPAL PRAISES ...

A young boy came home from school and told his mother, "I had a big fightwith Sidney. He called me ...

One day our professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept. Apre-med student rudely int...

"I'm sick!"
"Then you better stay home from school." she says.
"No, mom! I'm SICK!" he say...

As a sergeant in a parachute regiment I took part in several night
time exercises. Once, I wa...

one day there was a jewish boy who failed in math.His parents decided to send him to all the gre...

TEACHER: Why are you late, Frank?
FRANK: Because of the sign..
TEACHER: What si...

Once when Mary was young her school had a halloween party for themmary decided to go as a pirate aft...

One day,little Timmy was at school and heard the word "shit". He went home and asked his dad for the...

Sign in school: "In case of atomic attack, the federal ruling concerning prayer in this building...

One day,little Timmy was at school and heard the word "shit". He went home and asked his dad for...

One day our professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept. A pre-med student rud...

One day our professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept. A pre-med student rude...

Little Johnny was late for school. When he finally got therehis teacher asked,"Why are you late litt...

The social worker asked the bartender "What's the difference between your job and mine?" The...

This little 7 year old boy was sitting at his desk in school and he was squirming and squirming ...

On New York's Upper West Side lived an assimilated Jew who was a militant atheist. But he sent h...

These drastic measures were inadvertently taken in notes written by parents to excuse their chil...

51. Computer games go in and out faster than the latest fashions.

52. Any game can be mad...

A Jewish boy comes home from school and tells his mother he's been


given a par...