school

A kid, just getting home from school runs up to his dad...

"Daddy, daddy! I'm the on...

The little boy wasn't getting good marks in school. One day he made the teacher quite surprised....

A school teacher injured his back and had to wear a plaster cast around the upper part of his bo...

A kid, just getting home from school runs up to his dad..."Daddy, daddy! I'm the only one in my clas...

Teacher: Where is your homework? Pupil: I was mugged on the way to school and the mugger took eve...

What's the worst thing you're likely to find in the school cafeteria? The food!...

Teacher: You missed school yesterday didn't you? Pupil: Not very much!...

What's yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A dead school bus!...

I'm not going back to school ever again Why ever not? The teacher doesn't know a thing, all she ...

What's the longest piece of furniture in the school? The multiplication table....

Be sure that you go straight home after school I can't, I live just round the corner !...

What do French pupils say after finishing their school dinners ? Mercy !...

School-boy Howlers:

Arabs wear turbines on their heads.

A triangle whi...

Your classes at school were cancelled because the path to the restroom was flooded.

Durin...

His mother replies, "No you don't Johnny. You have a hideously deformed head. The other children...

A college pizza delivery boy arrived at the house of Larry Johnson. He delivered the pizza to hi...

What did you learn in school today? Not enough, I have to go back tomorrow!...

Mother: How was your first day at school? Son: It was all right except for some man called "Tea...

Boy to Friend: I'm sorry, I won't be able to go out after school. I promised Dad that I would st...

Playing truant from school is like a credit card Fun now, pay later !...

A guy goes to his high school class reunion. Having not seen anyone in twenty-five years he's very c...

A guy goes to his high school class reunion. Having not seen anyone in twenty-five years he's ve...

71. You meet the type of people you only thought existed in the movies.

72. You learn to ...

The following is a list with actual notes from parents (including spelling) to school offices: <...

Fred came home from his first day at school. "Nothing exciting happened", he told his mother, "E...

School Principal: I've called you into my office, Peter, because I want to talk to you about t...

Little Johnny comes home from school with a note from his teacher, indicating that "Johnny seems...

Boy comes home from school, very excited. Tells his mother he has a...

This was overheard at a campus eating establishment.

A guy grumbled at his friend,...

Fred: I got 100 in school today. Mother: Wonderful. What did you get 100 in? Jason: Two things: ...

Did you hear about the new course you can take at school?Yes, Intercourse....you go between periods ...

Why didn't anyone take the school bus to school? I wouldn't fit through the door....

Where did all the cuts and blood come from? The school went on a trip!...

The food in our school canteen is perfect. If your a bug!...

Why was the headmaster worried? Because there were too many rulers in school!...

Where do children learn their ABC's ? At LMN-tary school !...

Q. Why did the jellybean go to school? A. Because he wanted to be a smarty...

Q: How many school teachers does it take to change a lightbulb ?
A: Let's see: 2 A+'s, 3 A'...

41. College girls are the same as high school girls, just with more freedom...and no curfew.
...

A little boy did not go to school one day. The next day when the teacher asked him why, he said "Our...

An ideal homework excuse Teacher: Where is your homework? Pupil: I was mugged on the way to scho...

My friend, Bill, grew up on a farm in Tennessee and attended a one room country school. He said ...

A little girl walked daily to and from school. Though the weather that morning was questionable ...

A little girl walked daily to and from school. Though the weather that morning was questionable ...

After you barf, you feel better
You can barf whenever you want
When you barf, you do...

A student in Belle, West Virginia was suspended for three days for giving a classmate a cough dr...

The headmistress at a girls' prep school in the old South (circa 1959) calls down to the army base...

Teacher: Where is your homework? Pupil: I lost it fighting this kid who said you weren't the best...

A young boy on his way home from school must pass by a group of hookers. Everyday as he passes them,...

The little darlings were all in their seats on the first day of school and their new teacher introdu...