relationships

You know the honeymoon is pretty much over when you start to go out with the boys on Wednesday nit...

A little kid comes running into the backyard.He says, "Pop! Pop! Ma just got hit by a bus!""Son, you...

Why do you live like a NUN after you get married?NUN in the morning, NUN in the afternoon, NUN in th...

A man comes home drunk in the wee hours of the morningto find his wife angry and waiting for him at ...

The newlywed couple were checking into the hotel. The new groom approached the desk clerk. He said...

Night. A sleeping couple is lying in a bed. Door bell rings. A couple wakes up.Woman: "Quick! My hus...

One of the bachelors in the apartment development sneaked upbehind an older woman, covered her eyes ...

A few moments after the daughter announced her engagement, her Father asked, "Does this fellow hav...

An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can removea "Curse" he has been living with for the l...

A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is smokinga cigarette with a satisfied smile on i...

A man took his wife to the doctors.After a short examination the doctor said"Your wife's mind has co...

"Get this." said the bloke to his mates, "Last night while I was down the pub with you guys, a burgl...

Question: What's the penalty for bigamy?Answer: Two mothers-in-law...

One day a wife complained, "This wall clock almost killed my mother today.It fell only seconds after...

"First," said the playboy,"I'm going to buy you a few drinks and get you a bit loose.""Oh no you're ...

My wife and I were watching some TV show the other nite where the wife hired a private detective t...

After the third day of a really torrid honeymoon, the young couple finally emerged from their room...

With the divorce rate so high in America, a new organization has been formed called "Marriage Anon...

A student engineer in the office got engaged some time ago. At her wedding, I was reminding her of...

I know a husband and wife who have separate bedrooms, drive different cars, take separate vacation...

"I've had it with my wife." said the one drinking buddy to the other. "I'm filing for an divorce.""S...

Men are from earth.Women are from earth.Deal with it....

Some time after their bitter divorce, a man happened to pull up alongside his ex-wife at a traffic...

A recent study showed that the average husband only actually speaks to his wife about thirty-seven...

"I was in a very generous mood today," a woman says to her friend."I gave a poor beggar $25.""Thats ...

Following a bitter divorce a husband saw his wife at a party and sneered, "You know, I was a fool ...

HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIEDOld aunts used to come up to me at weddings...

A man happened to meet his ex-wife at a party, and after a few drinks, he suggested that they migh...

A rural Frenchman was on trial for killing his wife whenhe found her with a neighbor. Upon being ask...

Two friends meet each other on the street."Hello! Where are you coming from?" asked Bill."Oh, don't ...

Two wives were airing their troubles:"I'd like to get a divorce," said the first."My husband and I j...

Six stages of married life:1: Tri-weekly2: Try weekly3: Try weakly4. Try oysters5: Try anything6: Tr...

What's the difference between a nine-month pregnantwoman and a Playboy centerfold?Nothing, if the pr...

I'll never forget the first time I saw my husband, He was standing on a hill, his hair blowing in th...

I've got trouble with the wife again - she came into the bar looking for me and I asked for her numb...

What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?After a year, the dog is still excited to ...

A farmer and his girlfriend were out for a strollin the fields when they came across a cow and acalf...

This woman walks into a pharmacy and asks the pharmacist for some arsenic. He asks "What for?"She sa...

A guy goes up to this girl in a bar and says, "Would you like to dance?"The girl says, "I don't like...

A guy was trying to console a friend who'd just found his wifein bed with another man."Get over it, ...

Q: If your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nagat you, what have you done wrong? A: Made her ...

Why do women pay more attention to their appearance thanto improving their minds? Because most men a...

"Will the father be present during the birth?"asked the obstetrician."Nah," replied the mother-to-be...

What do Marriage and a Tornado have in common? Well you start off with a lot of blowing and then suc...

After she woke up, a woman told her husband, "I just dreamedthat you gave me a pearl necklace for Va...

A fellow in a bar notices a woman, always alone, who comes in on afairly regular basis. After the se...

A strained voice called out through the darkenedtheater, "Please, is there a doctor in the house?!" ...

A wife was berating her husband. He motioned for her to quiet down saying, "Don't unleash the beast ...

This guy runs home and bursts in yelling, "Pack your bags honey, I just won the lottery!" She sa...

One day a guy and a girl were making out in the guy's car in the girl's driveway. They began to get ...