redneck jokes

You might be a redneck if...
You think the French Riviera is a foreign car....

You might be a redneck if...
You fainted when you met Slim Whitman....

You might be a redneck if...
You think a hot tub is a stolen bathroom fixture....

You might be a redneck if...
You think that Dom Perignon is a mafia leader....

You might be a redneck if...
Your best ashtray is a turtle shell....

You might be a redneck if...
Your dad walks you to school because you are both in the ...

You might be a redneck if...
You own more cowboy boots than sneakers....

You might be a redneck if...
You prefer car keys to Q-tips....

You might be a redneck if...
You can spit without opening your mouth....

You might be a redneck if...
There is a stuffed possum anywhere in your house....

You might be a redneck if...
The first words out of your mouth every time you see frie...

You might be a redneck if...
Your biggest ambition in life is to "git thet big ol...

You might be a redneck if...
Your grandfather completely executes the "pull my fi...

You might be a redneck if...
You have refused to watch the Academy Awards since "...

You might be a redneck if...
You're moved to tears every time you hear Dolly Parton si...

A Redneck buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes toAustin to claim it where the man verifies hi...

You might be a redneck if...
You have started a petition to change the National Anthem...

You might be a redneck if...
Jack Daniels makes your list of "most admired people...

You might be a redneck if...
The directions to your house include "turn off the p...

You might be a redneck if...
Your momma has ever stomped into the house and announced,...

You might be a redneck if...
The most commonly heard phrase at your family reunion is ...

You might be a redneck if...
You think the last words to the Star Spangled Banner are ...

You might be a redneck if...
You think you are an entrepreneur because of the "Di...

You might be a redneck if...
Your dog can't watch you eat without gagging....

You might be a redneck if...
Your home has more miles on it than your car....

You might be a redneck if...
You celebrate Groundhog Day because you believe in it....

You might be a redneck if...
You've ever financed a tattoo....

You might be a redneck if...
You've ever been too drunk to fish....

You might be a redneck if...
Your car has never had a full tank of gas....

You might be a redneck if you can't get married to your sweetheart because there's a law against...

You might be a redneck if...
You've ever held somebody up with a caulk gun....

You might be a redneck if...
You have a Hefty bag for a convertible top....

You might be a redneck if...
You own at least 20 baseball hats....

You might be a redneck if...
There are more than ten lawsuits currently pending agains...

You might be a redneck if your dog can't watch you eat without gagging!...

You might be a redneck if...
You've totaled every car you've ever owned....

You might be a redneck if...
You've ever been arrested for loitering....

You might be a redneck if...
You can't get married to your sweetheart because there is...

You might be a redneck if...
Your four-year-old is a member of the NRA....

You might be a redneck if...
You've ever used a weedeater indoors....

You might be a redneck if...
Your brother-in-law is your uncle....

You might be a redneck if...
You own a homemade fur coat....

You might be a redneck if...
Your dog and your wallet are both on chains....

You might be a redneck if...
There is a gun rack on your bicycle....

You might be a redneck if...
You have to go down to the creek to take a bath....

You might be a redneck if...
Your dad is also your favorite uncle....

You might be a redneck if...
Your masseuse uses lard....

You might be a redneck if...
You think a 'cursor' is someone who swears a lot....

You might be a redneck if...
Taking a dip has nothing to do with water....

You might be a redneck if...
You've never paid for a haircut....