political jokes

I want to become a politician when I grow up so I've made a list of skills I want to aquire, but...

Clinton: (C)omplete (L)oser (I)n (N)ow (T)errorizing (O)ur (N)ation...

Q: How many Bill Clintons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Zero. He only screws...

Bill Clinton. The perfect thing if pro wrestling is too complicated for you....

One thing's sure about Clinton--he sure doesn't neglect domestic affairs....

Q: How does Bill Clinton say "I'm about to hurt you"?
A: "Trust me."...

No one can call Clinton a cheap taxpayer. Look at how much he is costing the taxpayers....

The money clip of the 90's will be a penny stuck in a paper clip....

How many Republicans does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it i...

When Clinton was asked what he thought about foreign affairs, he replied, "I don't know. I never...

Why doesn't Clinton have the courage to call his plan what it really is? "Socialism"...

We were so poor that even Bill Clinton's tax plan would't call us rich....

Did you hear what the FBI determined about Monica Lewinski?

Not only is she a slut...

Did you hear that the lab finally determined
what was on Monica Lewinsky's dress?
<...

What's the new name for the place where Bill Clinton does his business?

Q: What will you get if Clinton's health bill passes?
A: No Job....

Q. Why did George W Bush want to get to India before lunch?

A. He heard that ther...

I want to become a politician when I grow up so I've made a list of skills I want to aquire, butI've...

Republicans help the poor during the holidays by sending 50, one buck at a time, to panhandlers ...

Q: What do a Wendy's Hamburger and the Waco compound have in common? A: They were both cooked b...

Q: How do you spot Al Gore in a room full of secret service agents? A: He's the stiff one....

Q: What is the basement where White House staffers work called? A: The whine cellar....

Q: Know how to solve the Serbian/Bosnian problem in less than 48 hours? A: Put Janet Reno in ch...

Q: How many believable, competent, "just right for the job" presidential candidates does it ta...

QUESTION: How long does a United States Congressman serve? ANSWER: Until he gets caught....

QUESTION: Name the loser in the 1976 presidential race. ANSWER: The American people....

Clinton: (C)razed (L)ow-class (I)diot (N)ow (T)aking (O)ver (N)ation...

Q: Why did Bill Clinton cross the road?
A: To tax the chicken....

Q: What has Clinton done that no one has been able to do in the last 5 years?
A: Unite the Re...

Q: What does Clinton do to lose weight?
A: Runs away from the draft....

Q: Why should Republicans be buried 100 feet deep?

A: Because deep down, they're ...

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To get away from Bill Clinton....

Q: What's Clinton's favorite baseball team?
A: The Dodgers....

Q: What kind of neckwear does Hillary Clinton look best in?
A: A noose....

When Bill's Congress passes a law, it's a joke...but when Hillary tells a joke, it' the law....

Q: What do Hillary Clinton and Marie Antoinette have in common?
A: Nothing . . . yet....

Q: What are the two worst things about Bill Clinton?
A: His face....

How ironic... this is the second time in history a "Deep Throat" has been
at the center of...

Q: What is the difference between liberalism and socialism?
A: Socialism is dead....

Q: What is the difference between Whitewater and Watergate?
A: No one died in Watergate....

Bill Clinton virus - System makes lots of noise, but nothing happens....

It seems that Hillary has taken charge of hiring new interns for the White
House?
<...

"When Clinton said he was going to create 8 million new jobs, I didn't think they were all going...

Bill Clinton . . . a good reason not to root for anyone playing Arkansas....

Q: Why is Clinton prone to losing his voice?
A: He keeps having to eat his words....

What does Ted Kennedy have that Bill Clinton wishes he had??


An ex-wife an...

Ever since he met JFK, Clinton wanted to be president in the worst possible way...now he's succe...

Q: How many republicans does it take to raise your taxes? A: None. The democrats do that....

It has been said that the United States has the best congressmen money can buy....

Q: What's a conservative? A: A liberal who made it through adolescence....