miscellaneous

Why does the wind always go west to east in Wyoming?Because Nebraska sucks and Idaho blows....

Q. Why do men always want their brides to wear white?A. Because they want their dish washer to match...

Three old ladies went for a walk in the park, they were suddenly approached by a man who flashed at ...

Q: How do you amuse a blonde for hours?A: Write 'Please turn over' on both sides of a piece of paper...

A man leaned toward an attractive woman at a bar and told her, "Haven't I seen you somewhere before?...

A recent survey shows that the commonest form of marriage proposal these days consists of the words:...

"Oh doctor," moaned the woman to the psychiatrist. "Everyone calls me a nymphomaniac!""I understand,...

An then there once was the doctor who was so conceited about his looks and charm that whenever he to...

Dr. Dave's Dental-Chair Discovery: Dentists are incapable of asking questions that require a simple ...

How can you compare a lite beer to making love in a canoe? It's fucking close to water!...

In the United States alone, there are over 10,000 cases of batteredwomen.And to think... all this ti...

This is a story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody.There was an import...

When a woman gets married, she wants the 3 S's: sensitivity, sincerity, and sharing. What does she g...

During a fight, a husband threw a bowl of Jello at his wife.She had him arrested for carrying a cong...

A man calls the psychiatrist at a mental hospital and asks who's in room24."Nobody" comes the reply....

When you're having a bad day and it seems like people are trying to piss you off, just remember: it ...

Q: Why doesn't Mexico have an olympic team?A: Cause all of their runners, swimmers, and jumpers are ...

Did you ever hear about Blitzen the Brown nosed reindeer?He is twice as fast as Rudolf but doesn't s...

What happens when you play Country music records backwards?You Sober up, your wife comes home and yo...

Damn...did you see the size of that front tooth gap she had? Yeah...I didn't know wether to smile ba...

Five year old Johnny and his little sister are peeping through a keyhole at their parents making lov...

A nun, a priest, an Irishman, a Jew, a Scotsman, a rabbi and a blonde walk into a bar. The bartender...

A four year old girl was learning to say the Lord's Prayer. She was reciting it all by herself witho...

A college couple is under a tree on campus making out. After a while, the girl says, "I wish you had...

Did you hear about the Polish family that froze to death outside atheater?They were waiting to see t...

Jim and I have been married for two years now and we have not yet had our first husband-wife argumen...

"I'm fed up with your jealousy," the furious wife told her husband."Do you think I don't realize you...

Windows-A danger zone for Fido. Modem-A good way to get rid ofweeds. Mouse-Something the cat chases....

There was no action at the White House the past few days, hear about this?Yea, I guess it was labele...

"Information? I need the number of the Caseway Insurance Company.""Would you spell that, please?""Ce...

Airport immigration......NAME:Muhammed al FacidSEX:Yes 3 times a week.NO I MEAN FEMALE OR MALE:Oh th...

A little girl was diligently pounding away on her father's word processor. She told him she was writ...

Take the test...NO CHEATING!What does: A woman do sitting down? A man do standing up? A dog do on th...

What do men have difficulty retaining?a) a job b) a budget c) a promise d) a secret e) a friendship ...

If you constantly hear a married man brag about how he runs everything around the house, you can be ...

What's the best thing about having Alzheimer's Disease?1: You can hide your own Easter eggs. 2: You ...

I noticed my husband standing on the bathroom scale, sucking in his ample stomach.Thinking he was tr...

Did you hear in the news that a 747 recently crashed in a cemetery in Poland?The Polish officials ha...

"It's just to hot to wear clothes today," said Jack as he stepped out of the shower."Honey, what do ...

I, Caesar, when I heard of the fame To Cleopatra I straightway laid claim Ahead of my legions I inva...

Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and NobodyThis is a story about four people named Everbody, Somebody, ...

A blonde was filling out a job application form. She quickly filled out the columns entitled: Name, ...

English..... Spanish..... Te Amo French...... Je T'aime German...... Ich Liebe Dich Japanese.... Ai...

There are a lot of folks that can't understand how we ran out of oil here in the USA.Well, here's th...

"Bloody Stump" by: Rusty Zipper"Sliding Down a Flagpole" by: Dick Burns"Brown Spots on the Wall" By:...

Gross is having to tuck your hemorrhoid into your sock so you won't step onit when you walk....

Waiter to customer: "Our specialty is snails.""I know. One of them served me the last time I was her...

How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?Four. Actually, only one to screw it in. The othe...

Q: Why don't blondes double their recipes?A: The oven doesn't go to 700 degrees....

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. --Benjamin Franklin...