miscellaneous

TOP 10 REASONS FISHING IS BETTER THAN SEX....10. LASTS FROM DAWN TILL DUSK9. YOU HAVE YOUR OWN SECRE...

Three guys made a competition to see who would make a girl scream louder in bed.The first one went i...

A blonde goes horse back riding. It starts out slow, but then it starts to gallop. The blonde is enj...

These two Polish guys rent a boat and go fishing in a lake. They are amazed at the number of fish th...

A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their re...

The young blonde bride made her first appointment with a gynecologist and told him that she and her ...

The problem with the Iraqi army is that they were using Russian defense tactics: 1. Engage the enemy...

Bill Clinton made up a list of things he can say to his secretaries so they will know what he really...

While your sitting on the toilet you see written on the stall door: Congratulations! You've won on...

A blonde went in the library and walked up to the librarian behind the desk and said, "I would like ...

Once, there were three guys stranded on an island, and the mainland was 100 miles away.The first guy...

Q: What is your date of birth?A: July fifteenth.Q: What year?A: Every year....

What do you call a vegetarian with diahrrea?A salad shooter....

What's black and blue and hates sex?A rape victim....

Did you hear about the woman who has five legs? Her knickers fit her like a glove...

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick....

Why did the one-handed man cross the road? To get to the second hand shop....

How can you identify an blind pirate?He's the one with patches over both eyes....

What do you see when the pillsbary dough boy bends over?DoughnutsSent by Susan...

Why did the pervert cross the road?He was stuck to the chicken....

Q. Why don't polish women use vibrators?A. It chips their teeth....

Why did the blonde have a sore belly button? Her boyfriend was also blonde....

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? "You can change those things?!"...

Why do women talk more than men, and why are men smarter than women?Because women have four lips and...

What do you call Magic Johnson on rollerblades?ROLLAIDS!...

Q: What did they name the offspring of a blonde and a Puerto Rican?A: Retardo....

Why do women live longer than men?Someone has to stick around and clean up after them....

Why does a woman close her eyes when she's having sex?Because no woman ever wants to see a man enjoy...

How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?Nobody knows. It has never happened....

Psychiatrist: What is your problem? Patient: I think I'm a chicken.Psychiatrist: How long has this b...

Patient: Doctor, should I file my nails? Doctor: No, throw them away like everybody else....

Did you hear?The Energizer bunny has been arrested for Battery....

Why did the Siamese twins move to England?So the other one could drive....

Ok there are two gay guys and two lesbians. They are on a race to LA.Which of the two will get there...

What's invisible & smells like carrots?Bunny Farts!...

What's worse than a male chauvinist pig?A woman that won't do what she's told....

What do you call a woman outside the kitchen?Answer: A fugitive...

What does an army general kiss under at christmas? Missile toe...

How do you double the value of a Ford Pinto?Fill the gas tank!...

How do crazy people get through the forest?They take the psycho path....

A Chinese couple had a new baby. The nurse brings over a lovely, healthy, bouncy, black baby boy. "C...

A couple were in bed after celebrating their golden anniversary. The wife Said, "Darling, embrace me...

A man was praying to God. He said, "God!?" God responded, "Yes?" And the guy said, "Can I ask a ques...

Dave Barry on your husband's midlife crisis:If your husband is exhibiting signs of a midlife crisis,...

A man asked his doctor if he thought he'd live to be a hundred.The doctor asked the man, "Do you smo...

Grey Poupon and Dockers Pants:New company will be called - Poupon Pants.(my warped sense of humor lo...

The teacher was conducting a class in nutrition and asked the class to name four qualities of mohter...

The first 90% of project takes 90% of the time, the last 10% takes the other 90% of the time.If at f...

Bartender looks down to the end of the bar and sees a guy with his head down who hasn't touched his ...

How do you get a blond out of a tree? WaveHow do you drown a blond? Stick a scratch and sniff sticke...