miscellaneous

Q: If you've got a green ball in your left hand, and a green ball in your right hand, what do you ha...

Patient: Doctor, if I give up wine, women, and song, will I live longer? Doctor: Not really. It will...

A blonde's house is on fire. She calls 911 and says, "My house is onfire." The dispatcher says, "Wel...

What's brown and sticky?A stick....

How do you get a one armed MAN out of a tree?Wave at him....

What's blue and sings alone? - Dan Ackroyd....

Why can't Santa have children? He only comes once a year....

If god had wanted us to run around naked,we would have been born that way....

Q. What do elephants use for tampoons ?A. Sheep....

Q: What do you do if you come across an elephant in the jungle?A: Wipe it off and say you're sorry....

What does ADIDAS stand for?All Day I Dream About Sex....

a dyslexic man walks into a bra...Sent by Robert...

Yo mamma so stupid she got hit by a parked car....

Q: Why do men like blonde jokes?A: Because they can understand them....

Q: What did the blonde's mom say to her before the blonde's date?A: If you're not in bed by 12, come...

Q: What do a blonde and your computer have in common?A: You don't know how much either of them mean ...

Q: What is the difference between a blonde and a 747?A: Not everyone has been in a747....

How do you know if you are a geek?Your computer cost $6,000 and your car cost $500.00...

Q: You go to a cockfight. How do you know if a Polak is there?A: He's the one with a duck....

Why are men like paper cups?They're dispensable....

Do you know the punishment for bigamy? Two mother-in-law's!...

My marriage is childless so far, except for my husband!...

Operator, operator, call me an ambulance!!! Okay, sir, you're an ambulance!...

Which day does a fish hate?Fryday...

Help Wanted: Telepath.You know where to apply....

Knock Knock Who's there?BiggishBiggish who?No Thank you!...

Q: How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb?A: Two...but I don't know how they'd get in th...

2 people walk into a bar. The third one ducked....

What do you call a gay dinosaur?A megasorass....

Why did the condom fly across the road?-It was pissed off!!...

Deep in the woods sat a bear and a squirrel at the communal latrine. "Hmmm" says the bear to the squ...

This morning I woke up to the unmistakable scent of pigs in a blanket.That's the price you pay for l...

Q: Why didn't the blonde want a window seat on the plane?A1: She'd just dyed her hair.A2: She'd just...

What do the female reindeer do when Santa takes the male reindeer out on Christmas Eve?They go into ...

Why did the carload of lesbians get to San Francisco faster than the carload of gays?The lesbians go...

What's the difference between an English Sheepherder and Mick Jagger?Mick Jagger sings "Hey, Hey, yo...

An old guy is sitting on a bus when a punk-rocker gets on. The punkrocker's hair is red, green, yell...

My wife invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to our six- year-old daughter and sa...

A Blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so She goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his ...

A blonde and brunette were walking down the road.The brunette see's her husband, and he is carrying ...

What do you get when you cut a banana in two?A BANANA SPLIT!...

Q. What did God say after creating Adam A. I must be able to do better than that. Q. How do you get ...

Sometimes women are overly suspicious of their husbands.When Adam stayed out very late for a few nig...

10. "Get in there you big furry oaf, I don't care what you smell!"9. "Luke, at that speed do you thi...

An old man and women are going out for a meal to celebrate there 50th anniversary.The old man is get...

A little boy and a little girl, on a beach, are arguing. Little boy says to the little girl, "I have...

Guy goes to the pharmacy at his wife's request to buy her some tampons. About an hour later he comes...

Clinton and Gore went to a diner to get a bite to eat.A good looking waitress comes up and asks, "Ca...

Yesterday scientists revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones.To prove their theo...

A woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she stayed by his b...