miscellaneous

Down in Arkansas, they say that custom has changed little. Many a man still sleeps with a battle-axe...

A husband and wife were fighting about their sex life."You never even tell me when you're having an ...

1) Never eat at a place called Mom's 2) Never play cards with a man named 'Doc' 3) Never get in bed ...

Prisoner: Look here, doc! You've already removed my spleen, tonsils, adenoids, and one of my kidneys...

Q. Why are Australians like kiwifruit?A. Because they are rough on the outside, green on the inside....

What do you call a dead athiest?All dressed up and no place to go!...

A nude jogger was running past two old women.One had a stroke, the other missed!...

Why did the Priest wear underwear in the shower?He didn't want to look down on the unemployed...

What is Bill Clinton's favorite web browser? Microsoft Intern Exploiter...

Q: Why do so many Polish navy personnel drown? A: Because when the engine stops, they all have to ge...

Question: Why did the hamster cross the road?Answer: Because it was stuck in the Chicken's ass!...

Did you hear about the dyslexic devil-worshipper?He sold his soul to Santa!...

What did the baby chick say to his mummy when she laid an Orange?" Look what Marma-Lade!! "...

Whats the most embrassing thing for a cheerleader?When she does the splits and 8 class rings fall ou...

A man frantically calls 911 and says, "help...my wife has gone into labor and her contractions are 1...

He: Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make love to you in the worst way.She: Well, you ...

Once heard from a girl who just broke up with someone:My old boyfriend and I weren't compatible. I'm...

After having quadruplets, the mother named them... Adolph, Rudolph, Getoff, and Stayoff....

A LITTLE SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT:Assume you drive your car at light speed. What happens when you tu...

Yo' Mamma is so ugly, I went into your house saw her TV was covered with cockroaches!I asked her wha...

Did you hear about the blonde that stared at an orange juice can for20 minutes because it said conce...

The problem with keeping an open mind is that all my ideas tend to fall out....

Q: Did you hear about the 4 Pollocks who froze to death in adrive-in movie???They went to see "Close...

Headline in today's newspaper:"Suicidal Twin kills sister by mistake"!...

A long time ago, way back then...we used to spell Canada, Cnd.Why? you ask. Well it's really simple....

How many Kentucky basketball fans does it take to roof a house?Three, if you slice them really thin....

Two friends in a Bar:JACK: Joe, at what moment does your wife shout loudest during sex?JOE: Er..., w...

In a cemetery in Hartscombe, England:On the 22nd of June- Jonathan Fiddle -Went out of tune....

Q: Why dont mexicans and blacks have children together?A: They're afraid the kids will grow up too l...

A guy says, "For our Twentieth , I'm taking my wife to Australia." His friend says, "That's going to...

Why does the wind always go west to east in Wyoming?Because Nebraska sucks and Idaho blows....

Q. Why do men always want their brides to wear white?A. Because they want their dish washer to match...

Three old ladies went for a walk in the park, they were suddenly approached by a man who flashed at ...

Q: How do you amuse a blonde for hours?A: Write 'Please turn over' on both sides of a piece of paper...

A man leaned toward an attractive woman at a bar and told her, "Haven't I seen you somewhere before?...

A recent survey shows that the commonest form of marriage proposal these days consists of the words:...

"Oh doctor," moaned the woman to the psychiatrist. "Everyone calls me a nymphomaniac!""I understand,...

An then there once was the doctor who was so conceited about his looks and charm that whenever he to...

Dr. Dave's Dental-Chair Discovery: Dentists are incapable of asking questions that require a simple ...

How can you compare a lite beer to making love in a canoe? It's fucking close to water!...

In the United States alone, there are over 10,000 cases of batteredwomen.And to think... all this ti...

This is a story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody.There was an import...

When a woman gets married, she wants the 3 S's: sensitivity, sincerity, and sharing. What does she g...

During a fight, a husband threw a bowl of Jello at his wife.She had him arrested for carrying a cong...

A man calls the psychiatrist at a mental hospital and asks who's in room24."Nobody" comes the reply....

When you're having a bad day and it seems like people are trying to piss you off, just remember: it ...

Q: Why doesn't Mexico have an olympic team?A: Cause all of their runners, swimmers, and jumpers are ...

Did you ever hear about Blitzen the Brown nosed reindeer?He is twice as fast as Rudolf but doesn't s...

What happens when you play Country music records backwards?You Sober up, your wife comes home and yo...

Damn...did you see the size of that front tooth gap she had? Yeah...I didn't know wether to smile ba...