miscellaneous

This old geezer of 78 marries a girl of18. The morning after the wedding night, the girl comes down ...

How to hunt elephants -- Lawyer's styleLawyers don't hunt elephants, but they do follow the herdsaro...

Two men are in a bar are boasting about their prowess and one of them says, "My cock is longer than ...

A rich society lady was being driven home in the rain when her Rolls Royce gets a puncture.The car s...

I love to go to the dentist. A man in white hovering over me while I'm trapped helpless in a chair. ...

A boy was taking care of his baby sister while his parents went to town shopping. He decided to go f...

Two guys in a jungle, come around a corner and meet a lion head-on pawing the ground.One guy ever so...

Two elderlies are rocking on the porch at the home. "Bet you can't guess how old I am," he says. "Be...

"You know," a guy told his buddies, "I'm a lucky man.I never realized how much my wife loved me unti...

1. If I like it, it's mine.2. If its in my mouth, it's mine.3. If I can take it from you, it's mine....

A guy goes into a bar and seats himself next to a hot looking woman. After a few drinks he musters t...

"Honey, I have a confession to make," a guy told his bride. "I'm a golf nut. You'll never see me on ...

A guy walks into a local pharmacy and walks up to the counter where a lady pharmacist is filling pre...

Always give 100% at work.......12% on Monday23% on Tuesday40% on Wednesday20% on Thursday5% on Frida...

Q. Who is the most popular man in a nudist colony? A. The one who can carry 2 cups of coffee and nin...

The judge said to Mickey "I can not grant you a divorce from Minney, there is no evidence that she i...

A man and woman were lying in bed on night and the woman said to the man, "I sure wish I had bigger ...

Well, I was interviewing Hillary Clinton the other day, and we came to the subject of her and Bill's...

Two guys get stuck on a desert island.They are soon caught by the nativesand brought to a village an...

Did you hear about the guy who got his vasectomy done at Sears? -Every time he gets a hard-on, th...

Q. What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree ?A. Hold on to your nuts, this is going to be a he...

John : I don't know what to buy - a cow or a bicycle.Peter : You will look silly riding a cow.John :...

Did you hear about the blonde coyote? She got stuck in a trap, chewed off three of her legs and was ...

What did the blonde do when he heard that 90% of accidents occur within five miles of home? He moved...

How are a Christmas tree and a priest alike?They both have ornamental balls....

Q:How is a blonde and a screen door alike? A:The harder you bang them the looser they get....

Heard about the Polish hockey team?They all drowned in spring training....

What is the average number of times in a bachelor's life that his bed is made?Once, when it was stil...

Why do a married man and his single male friend envy each other?Each one thinks the other is having ...

How can you determine that a death certificate was filled by a redneck doctor?He signs "his" name un...

What is a dyslexic agnostic insomniac?Someone who lays awake at night wondering if there really is a...

How did the dairy queen get pregnant? The burger king showed her his whopper!!!...

Teacher: Jeff, have you been copying Johnny's test again?Jeff: Yes, but how did you know?Teacher: On...

Ever hear about the blonde coyote who got a leg stuck in a trap -she chewed off three legs and was s...

A minister gave a talk to the Lion's Club on sex.When he got home he couldn't tell his wife that he ...

Some good put-downs...ya' never know when you'll need one!I refuse to enter a battle of the wits wit...

A couple returned from their honeymoon and it's obvious to everyone that they are not talking to eac...

I Still Miss My Ex..But My Aim Is Getting Better!...

Why are men like blenders?You need one, but you're not quite sure why....

Where does a 200 ton elephant sit?Anywhere he wants!...

When blondes have more fun, do they know it?...

Why is 6 scared of 7?Because 7 ate nine! (7, 8, 9)...

An airliner was having engine trouble, and the pilot instructed the cabin crew to have the passenger...

A spokesperson for the U.S. Mint announced that a new fifty-cent piece was being issued to honor two...

The word of the day is "LEGS", let's go back to my place and spread the word.Let's name your legs. T...

Two elderly ladies meet at the launderette after not seeing one another for some time. After inquiri...

My wife came home yesterday and said, "Honey, the car won't start, but I know what the problem is."I...

A women's lib speaker was addressing a large group and said, "Where would man be today if it were no...

A Polak was suffering from constipation, so his doctor prescribed suppositiories. A week later the P...

A man who thinks he's George Washington has been seeing a psychiatrist. He finishes up one session b...