miscellaneous

A Canadian is walking down the street with a case of beer under hisarm. His friend Doug stops him an...

A funny story I know comes from someone's father-in-law who is a pharmacist. One of his customers co...

When is it OK for a lady to slap a midget? When they are slow dancing and he tells her how nice her ...

A blonde and a brunette jumped off a bridge, who landed in the water first?The brunette. The blonde ...

What is the difference between a Scottish man and a member of the Rolling Stones?A member of the Rol...

Q: A blonde ordered a pizza and the clerk asked if he should cut itin six or twelve pieces.A: "Six, ...

Q: Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on her back?A: From crawling across the street when the ...

Q: How do you drown a blonde?A1: Put a mirror at the bottom of the pool.A2: Don't tell her to swallo...

Q: How do you know when a blonde has been making chocolate chip cookies?A: You find M&M shells all o...

Q: What do you call a dead blonde in a closet?A: The 1984 Hide and Seek World Champion....

The years of peak mental activity are surely between age four and18.At four, we know all the questio...

Marriage counselor to female client: Maybe your problem is that you've been waking up grumpy every m...

How can you tell that your blonde secretary has been typing on your computer?White-out on the screen...

Q: How do you get a heavy metal guitarist to stop playing guitar?A: Put sheet music in front of him....

Boss asks secretary "Do you know what the difference is between a Caesar Salad and a blowjob?""No", ...

Q. What do you call a dead blonde in a closet?A. The 1988 Hide-and-Go-Seek World Champion....

Q: How many Bill Gates does it take to change a lightbulb?A: One - he puts it in the socket and lets...

There were three dogs at the vet talking to each other when one says,"I chewed up all my masters sho...

A man went to the market this last week to buy Valentines' cards for his daughter and mother. The 50...

The boss of a large company says to his protege : " I'm transferring you to the northern office "The...

I know I haven't known you very long and I shouldn't be asking you for this so soon, but I really ne...

Three guys and a lady were sitting at the bar talking about their professions. The first guy says " ...

A mother was telling her little girl what her own childhood was like: "We used to skate outside on a...

During a recent vacation in Atlantic City, a couple went to see a popular magic show. After one espe...

An agitated patient was stomping around the psychiatrist's office, running his hands through his hai...

An old man was sitting on a bench in the mall when a young man with spiked hair came over and sat do...

The next door neighbor of a middle-aged wife came over to inform her that her retired husband was ch...

As a couple sat in the living room, watching TV, the phone rang.The husband picked it up, listened f...

If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it was, andalways will be yours. If it never r...

Who Has The Best Memory?Three guys are debating who has the best memory.First guy says, "I can remem...

A man who thought he was John the Baptist was disturbing the neighborhood, so for public safety, he ...

Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in the voodoo or occult?A: We both do.Q:...

Why don't cannibals eat comedians?They taste funny....

Why can't Frankenstein have children? Because his nuts are on his neck....

Did you here about the new atomic cocktail?one sip & you go out with a poof :0)Sent by Peter...

Q: Why is a violist like a terrorist?A: They both fuck up bowings....

Q: Why don't cannibals eat clowns?A: They taste funny!!...

How do you make a hot dog stand?Steal its chair....

I have got a drinking problem.... I've got two hands, but only one mouth......

has does a blonde have safe sex? She locks the car door....

Why did the blonde cross the road? I don't know. Neither did he....

Q: What did the digital clock say to his mother? A: Look ma no hands!...

Q:What did the ghost eat at his birthday party?A:I scream...

What do you get when you cross a Rotweiler with a Collie?A dog who bites off your arm and go's to ge...

The top 10 things men know about women are:1.2.3.4.5.(I think you get it where we're going with this...

Your Momma is so fat the last time she saw 90210 was on a scale....

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs?A: It don't matter what you call him, he ain't commin'!...

Q. What happens when a frog parks illegaly?A. It gets toad!...

Whats the difference between a pig and a fox?.A 12-pack of beer!...

What's the difference between a terrorist and a wife?You can negotiate with the terrorist!...