miscellaneous

Q: How does an Amish father find his daughter in the field? A: Pretty good....

After three years of marriage, Kim was still questioning her husband about his lurid past. "C'mon, t...

"I got your community service right here pal!" "Boy your chamber sure does look different with the l...

The famous general died and his ashes were to be taken to Arlington National Cemetery. All the air l...

You're so ugly, yo momma had to tie a pork chop around your neck just to get the dog to play with yo...

Everyone hear the news about Snow White, Cinderella, and Sleeping Beauty being expelled from Disneyl...

A business person once sat behind a small child on an airliner traveling from Chicago to N.Y.The kid...

As he lay on his deathbed, the man confided to his wife, "I cannot die without telling you the truth...

Over drinks one evening two gentleman were having a discussion about the charms, or lack there-of of...

Tombstone Epitaph:Oops! Harry Edsel Smith of Albany, New York:Born 1903--Died 1942Looked up the elev...

My kids love going to the Web, and they keep track of their passwords by writing them on Post-it not...

Father: (at hospital looking through glass at newly arrived babies) "Kitchy kitchy koo. Look, she sm...

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wallHumpty Dumpty had a great fallAll the kings horses and all the kings menS...

5 Good Reasons not to be a Penis!1. You're bald your entire life.2. You have a hole in your head.3. ...

Sign on a brake repair shop in Joliet, Illinois, "We stand in front of our work."Sign on a muffler s...

Two blondes observed in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their Mercedes with a coat hanger...

This guy runs home and bursts in yelling "Pack your bags honey, I just won the lottery!!"She says "O...

A clerk was showing a lady a very nice dress shirt and tie."Now this," the clerk said, "is absolutel...

A man walked into a psychiatrist's office, sat down, took out a pack of cigarettes. He removed a cig...

What happened to a Brighton Beach prostitute who had an appendectomy performed by a Soviet emigre su...

Can u believe what people do in the church these days? I was in the church listening tothe priest's ...

Do you know what would have happened if it had been Three Wise Womeninstead of Three Wise Men? They ...

There was a horrible mistake at the hospital. A man who was scheduled for a vasectomy was instead gi...

Q: What kind of wood does not float?A: Natalie Wood!...

What is the difference between a terrorist and a PMS woman?You can negotiate with the terrorist....

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of shit? A: The bucket....

What is the difference between men and pigs?Pigs don't turn into men when they drink....

What's the difference between government bonds and men?Bonds mature....

What do you call a witch at the beach? I don't know? A sand-witch!...

A woman went to the beach with her children. Her 4-year-old son ran up to her, grabbed her hand, and...

A car was involved in an accident in a street. As expected, a large crowd gathered.A newspaper repor...

A fellow in a bar notices a woman, always alone, come in on a fairly regular basis. After the second...

William Bennett recalls when one of his "radical students" at Boston University announced that he an...

A sex therapist was doing research at the local college when one of the male volunteers told him, "W...

A man goes into a drug store and asks the pharmacist if he can give him something for the hiccups. T...

A drill sergeant had just chewed out one of his cadets, and as he was walking away, he turned to the...

A panhandler was caught trying to sneak aboard a Princess liner about to embark on a three-day trip ...

Walking down the street, a man passes a house and notices a little boy trying to reach the doorbell....

A woman is on her honeymoon with her new French husband. She is giving him oral sex when the phone r...

Is it all right to bring a date to the wedding? Not if you are the groom.How many showers is the bri...

Uh...top 10 things not to say to a naked man:10: Awww...that's cute9. Well, at least you're good at ...

Dad, can I ask you something?Sure! What about?You see, I'm already fourteen and...I think it's just ...

Q: What would Princess Diana be doing right now if she were alive today?A: Scratching on the lid o...

The Answer: A Cockrobin.The Question: What are you putting in my mouth, Batman?...

What's sicker than sick?masturbating with your grandma's ashes under your foreskin.......

Did you hear about that guy who was tap dancing?He broke his ankle when he fell into the sink....

Grant's Bar and Casino: Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear....

Here's a silly one....Why did the skeleton burp?Because it didn't have the guts to fart....

What occurs twice in a lifetime, but only once in ayear, twice in a week, but never in a day?The let...

Doctor, Doctor. Have you got anything that will cure fleas?Maybe, what made them sick?...