miscellaneous

Mike and Bill, are hanging out in the lone bar in a one-horse town in northern Idaho, when a local r...

Spent a decade on the leading edge of drug experimentation. Still boots to DOS. Still sending messag...

Let's face it - English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neith...

221. What do you get when you cross a blonde and a gorilla? Who knows, there is only so much a goril...

The first 90% of project takes 90% of the time, the last 10% takes the other 90% of the time.

Dear Mom and Dad:Since I left for college I have been remiss in writing and I am sorry for my though...

You?ve come to the annoying realization that your parents were right about almost everything.The bag...

Stupid people LICENSE TO STEAL Two Kentucky men tried to pull the front off a cash machine by runnin...

As he was quietly watching television at home, a chap hears a sound on the roof of his house and rus...

Neighbors had complained to the mayor about the noisy pub on the corner of 3rd & Lambourne. Seems th...

You can't be real. May I pinch you to see if I'm dreaming?Hey, didn't we go to different high school...

The US Standard railroad gauge (distance between the rails) is 4 feet, 8.5 inches. That's an exceedi...

A guy with leprosy wins tickets to see the world series. But when he gets there, he has trouble find...

Women's English:Yes = No No = Yes Maybe = NoI'm sorry = You'll be sorry We need = I want It's your d...

Q: What do a redneck divorce and a tornado have in common?A: Either way somebody loses a trailer hom...

This story occurred on Melbourne radio last week. One of the FM stations has a competition where the...

Ebonics Crimmus PomeWuz de nite befo Crimmus An' all ower de hood ereybody wuz' sleepin' Dey wuz sle...

Actual comments received in 1996 from the Bridger Wilderness registration sheets and comment cards:T...

1. I wish you were a door so I could slam you all day.2. Nice legs...what time do they open?3. Do yo...

60 Californians put on sweaters (if they can find one) 50 Miami residents turn on the heat 40 You ca...

A successful businessman flew to Vegas for the weekend to gamble. He lost the shirt off his back, an...

A WW II American soldier had been on the front lines in Europe for three months when he was finally ...

New College Courses for Men as Prepared by Women:1... Combating Stupidity2... You, Too, Can Do House...

-Why do brunettes like their dark hair color? It doesn't show the dirt.-Who makes all the bras for b...

Posts empty articles to Usenet, and enjoys rereading them later. Prefers three left turns to one rig...

If ya really want that new job, you may want to avoid saying these:"You could do worse." "I'll work ...

Hamlet's Cat's SoliloquyTo go outside, and there perchance to stay Or to remain within: that is the ...

THE COWBOY CODE1. A cowboy removes his hat when entering the presence of a lady, although he may lea...

Farmer Joe decided his injuries from his recent accident were serious enough to take the trucking co...

The real interpretation of corportate titles:CHAIRMAN OF THE BOARD: Leaps tall building in a single ...

The Perfect Dump - Every once in a while, each of us experiences a perfect dump, it's rare, but a th...

Little Leroy came into the kitchen where his mother was making dinner. His birthday was coming up an...

BLAMESTORMING - Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed a...

I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like...

Degrees (Fahrenheit)* 65 degrees:Hawaiians declare a two-blanket night* 60 degrees:Californians put ...

Bill gates has been in a car accident. He finds himself in purgatory, being sized up by St. Peter. "...

O MY DEAR WIFE,During the past year I have tried to make love to you 365 times. I have succeeded 36 ...

Leroy is given a homework assignment. Still befuddled by the whole school thing, Leroy is a trooper....

Farmer Joe decided his injuries from the accident were serious enough to take the trucking company r...

by : Scott Corliss 1. The Communist Manifesto as read by Ronald Reagan 2. The Torah as read by Louis...

Advantages of dating older women...An older woman will never wake you up in the middle of the night ...

Investigating a purse snatching, Brunswick, Georgia, detectives picked up a man who fit the thief's ...

Bill Gates tragically died in a car accident. Arriving at the pearly gates, he finds himself being s...

Two new chemical elements have recently been discovered. Here for the first time is a description of...

10 year old Johnny's mother, who was a hard working single mom, had been promising for some time now...

How to identify a Canadian driver:1. - One hand on wheel, one hand on horn: MONTREAL2. - One hand on...

A COLONEL ISSUED THE FOLLOWING DIRECTIVE TO HIS EXECUTIVE OFFICERS: "Tomorrow evening at approximate...

If athletes get athlete's foot, astronauts get missile toe.A bird dog could be called a point setter...

Love 'em or hate 'em, it's Pun time. Puns, or "groaners" like some folks like to call them are fun. ...

These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods: On Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping...