medicine

"Mr. Chilton," the analyst said, "I think this will be your last visit.""Does that mean I'm cured?" ...

A rather senile old lady went to her doctor complaining ofdraining and a feeling of fullness in her ...

I said to the doctor "I have this ringing in my ears."He said, "Don't answer it!"...

When his wife's snoring woke him for the third straight night, Harry went to the bathroom medici...

A friend of mine studying medicine once told me this story.

Apparently one day the...

Herman the hypochondriac began sobbing before a doctor."I'm sure I've got a liver disease, and I'm g...

Did you hear about the Jewish doctor who gave a patient six months to live?When the patient couldn't...

A midget walks into the doctors and says, "Doc, I've got these fuckingitchy balls and I can't do any...

A girl goes to the doctor. She says, "Doc, I'm freakin' out...I'm freakin' out...my pee's coming out...

Howard had felt guilty all day long. No matter how much he tried to forget about it, he couldn't. ...

Hiram answers the telephone, and it's an emergency room doctor.The doctor says, "Your wife was in a ...

A construction worker goes to the doctor and says, "Doc, I'm constipated."The doctor examines him fo...

This male prostitute contracted syphilis.He did okay for a while, but then his business dropped off....

This male prostitute contracted leprosy.He did okay for a while, but then his business dropped off....

A very homely young woman made an appointment with a psychiatrist.She walked into his office and sai...

When white man found this land, Indians were running it.There were:- No Taxes- No Debt- Plenty buffa...

What's the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer?The taste....

A certain college professor was notorious for getting off the topic ofthe lecture, and on to his fav...

I have an earache.

2000 B.C. - Here, eat this root.
1000 A.D. - That root is...

2000 B.C. - Here, eat this root. 1000 A.D. - That root is heathen. Here, say this prayer. 1850 ...

Q: Does pregnancy cause hemorrhoids?A: Pregnancy causes anything you want to blame it for....

A profoundly ugly girl went to the psychiatrist."My life is a mess, doctor," she began, "I am sofuck...

|Where do ants go for their holidays?Frants!What do you call an ant who skips school?A truant!What d...

Three nurses all decided to play a joke on the doctor they worked for. Later in the day, they all go...

A man went to the doctor's. The doctor came in and said,"Well, I've got some good news and some bad ...

Toilet TrickHey, this party was on April Fool's Day, so anything goes, right? Anyway, at the party t...

What is the difference between an oral and rectal thermometer? The taste....

A relative heard this on C-Span the night of President Clinton's economic
address...

A woman consulted a doctor, explaining that for many years she sufferred from excessive flatulan...

What to Do With All Those "Free" Soaps When Travelling This is some correspondence which a...

Attached is some correspondence which actually occurred between a
London hotel's ...

A woman was terribly overweight, so her doctor put her on a diet."I want you to eat regularly for 2 ...

The following coorespondence actually occurred between a London hotel's staff and one of its gue...

"How did it happen?" the doctor asked the middle-aged farmhand as he set the man's broken leg."Well,...

A woman had some problems, so she went to her doctor of twenty years.They had the following conversa...

A young lady walks into a doctors office. "Doctor I'm suffering from a terrible discharge" The Docto...

An eye-doctor was having his 40th birthday, and gathered lotsof friends and family in his house. His...

Elite Modeling Agency (tm)
"Where ugly people need not apply."

Pop Rocks (tm...

An attractive young girl, chaperoned by an ugly old lady,entered the doctor's office."We have come f...

A lecturer teaching medicine was tutoring a class on 'Observation'. He took out a jar of yellow-...

The doctor looked at the woman who had come to him for an examination. "Mrs. Brown, I have some good...

There was a costume party at a mental hospital; the theme of the party was "war". The first person c...

A man and a woman were waiting at the hospital donation center.Man: "What are you doing here today?"...

What do you get when you cross Viagra with Rogaine?

Don King.

Following t...

A woman gives birth by a Caesarian and passes out. When she comes to her senses, the doctor approach...

A lecturer teaching medicine was tutoring a class on 'Observation'.
He took out a jar of y...

A beautiful, voluptuous woman goes to a gynecologist. The doctor takes one look at this woman and ...

A patient goes to a Polish doctor:



Patient: I am having a hard time hea...

Seems there were these three professionals sitting around talking about the oldest profession (n...

A group of doctors were at a convention in Switzerland. The topic of discussion was the new medi...