Answering machine
Math jokes
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Hello, this is probably 438-9012, yes, the house of the famous statistician. I'm probably not a...
Math jokes Jokes
- Math jokes
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Crocodile is longer
Math jokes
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Prove that the crocodile is longer than it is wide.
Lemma 1. The crocodile is longer than...Dollars equal cents
Math jokes
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Theorem: 1$ = 1c.
Proof:
And another that gives you a sense of money disappearing.
...Log negative one zero
Math jokes
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Theorem: log(-1) = 0
Proof:
a. log[(-1)^2] = 2 * log(-1)
On the other hand:
b. l...Math one-liner
Math jokes
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Philosophy is a game with objectives and no rules. Mathematics is a game with rules and no objec...Math one-liner
Math jokes
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If I had only one day left to live, I would live it in my statistics class: it would seem so muc...Mathematical baby formula
Math jokes
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Add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and multiply....New car (Math)
Math jokes
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Q: Why didn't the math student get the new car?
A: Because he couldn't find anybody to c...Numbers equal zero
Math jokes
64 hits
Theorem : All numbers are equal to zero.
Proof: Suppose that a=b. Then
a = b
a^2 = ...Pi (Math)
Math jokes
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Q: What did the circumference of the circle say to its diameter?
A: Hey, do you wanna sh...Purchasing the shoes
Math jokes
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A shoeseller meets a mathematician and complains that he does not know what size shoes to buy. ...Statistical one-liner
Math jokes
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The most important statistic for car manufacturers is autocorrelation....Statistical one-liner
Math jokes
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There is no truth to the allegation that statisticians are mean. They are just your standard no...Statistical one-liner
Math jokes
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Old statisticians never die, they just undergo a transformation....Statistical one-liner
Math jokes
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Q: Why don't statisticians like to model new clothes?
A: Lack of fit....Statistical one-liner
Math jokes
66 hits
The only time a pie chart is appropriate is at a baker's convention....Statistical one-liner
Math jokes
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Statisticians must stay away from children's toys because they regress so easily....Statistical one-liner
Math jokes
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According to recent surveys, 51% of the people are in the majority....Statistical one-liner
Math jokes
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Q: How do you tell one bathroom full of statisticians from another?
A: Check the p-value....The birthday study
Math jokes
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It is proven that the celebration of birthdays is healthy. Statistics show that those people wh...The fate of marriages
Math jokes
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It is often cited that there are half as many divorces as marriages in the US, so one concludes ...The job interview
Math jokes
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A mathematician, applied mathematician and a statistician all apply for the same job. At the int...The promising PhD candidate
Math jokes
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A promising PhD candidate was presenting his thesis at his final
examination. He proceede...THE TOP TEN REASONS TO BECOME A STATISTICIAN
Math jokes
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Deviation is considered normal.
We feel complete and sufficient.
We are "mean" lov...
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