Legal Jokes

Joe the lawyer died suddenly, at the age of 45. He got to the gatesof Heaven, and the angel standing...

A defending attorney was cross examining a coroner.The attorney asks, "Before you signed thedeath ce...

The bartender asks him "What'll you have?". The guy answers, "A scotch, please". The bartender hands...

A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing atthe counter meth...

A hill country husband died and left everything to his wife.He put a provision in his will though th...

A lawyer and two friends, a Rabbi and a Hindu holy man, had car trouble inthe countryside and asked ...

A lawyer named Strange died, and his friend asked the tombstone maker to inscribe on his tombstone, ...

A lawyer passed on and found himself in Heaven,but not at all happy with his accommodations.He compl...

A lawyer returns to his parked BMW to find the headlights broken and his front bumper smashed. There...

A lawyer returns to his parked BMW to find the headlightsbroken and considerable damage. There's no ...

A local United Way office realized that it had never received a donation from the town's most succ...

A man walked into a lawyer's office and inquired about the rates. "Fifty dollars for three questions...

A man walks into a friend and sees that his friend's caris total loss and covered with leaves, grass...

Attorney to witness: "And where was the location of the accident?"Witness: "Approximately milepost 4...

Two men are meeting on the street."It was very cold this morning.""How cold was it?"I do not no exac...

A tough case was being argued in court. The defense attorney,feeling that he was in trouble, sent t...

A tourist wanders into a back-alley antique shop in San Francisco's Chinatown. Picking through the ...

An airliner was having engine trouble, and the pilot instructedthe cabin crew to have the passengers...

An elderly patient needed a heart transplant and discussed his options with his doctor. The doctor s...

An old man was critically ill. Feeling that death was near, he called his lawyer. "I want to become ...

An older woman was in the pastoral study counceling for her upcoming fourth wedding. "Father," s...

At a jury trial with the jury consisting of 8 men and 4 women:Defendant: "Your Honor, I wish to chan...

At night court, a man was brought in and set before the judge.The judge said, "State your name, occu...

"You seem to have more than the average share of intelligence for a man ofyour background," sneered ...

Taylor was desperate for business, and was happy to be appointed by the court to defend an indigent ...