lawyer jokes

He tells you that his last good case was a Budweiser.



When the prosecutors ...

It was so cold last winter that I saw a lawyer with his hands in his own pockets.A man walked into a...

A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party.



Their conversation was c...

A lawyer was helping a poor old widow settle her husband's estate. Upon completion of the job, h...

Q: You are stuck in an elevator with a tiger, a lion and a lawyer. You have a ...

One day a man (who hates lawyers)found a lamp along the beach.he rubbed it and a genie popped ou...

Q: If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?
A: It might be your bi...

A lawyer died and arrived at the pearly gates. To his dismay, there were thousands of people ahe...

A very wealthy lawyer retreated for several weeks each year to his summer home in the backwoods ...

Two lawyers walking through the woods spotted a vicious-looking bear.

The first ...

Q: What do you get when you cross a lawyer with a pit bull?

A: A dishonest pit bull....

The staff at a local United Way office realized that it had never received a donation from the t...

There was a job opening in the country's most prestigious law firm and it finally comes down to ...

Q. How do you stop a lawyer from drowning?

A. Shoot him before he hits the water....

What do a lawyer and a sperm have in common?
They both hope to be human someday....

|A very wealthy lawyer retreated for several weeks each year to his summer home in the backwoods of ...

A very wealthy lawyer retreated for several weeks each year to his summer home in the backwoods ...

A lawyer named Strange died, and his friend asked the tombstone maker to inscribe on his tombstone, ...

|A lawyer was driving his big BMW down the highway, singing to himself, "I love my BMW, I love my BM...

A lawyer was driving his big BMW down the highway, singing to himself, "I love my BMW, I love my...

Visiting a lawyer for advice, the wife said, "I want you to help me get a divorce. The Lawyer says O...

** How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb? How many can you afford?

** How ...

There once was a lawyer who was so fanatical about his golf game that he used to play every day ...

LAWYER: A cat who settles a dispute between 2 mice....

How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

How many can you afford?

...

A lawyer lies dying, his partner of 40years by his bedside. "Jack, I've got to confess. I'...

What's the definition of lawyer?



The larval form of a politician....

Why do you need only two pallbearers at a lawyer's funeral?
There are only two handle...

What's black and brown and looks good on a lawyer?

A Doberman Pinscher.

It was so cold last week I saw a Lawyer with his hands in his own pockets !...

There was a job opening in the country's most prestigious law firm and it finally comes down to ...

A woman and her little girl were visiting the grave of the little girl's grandmother. On their way t...

The day after a verdict had been entered against his client, the lawyer rushed to the judge's ch...

lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer le...

The Pope died and went to heaven. When he got there, he found a lawyer in line in front of him at th...

A butcher was minding his store one day, when a dog ran in and stole a cut of meat off his count...

How can you tell when a lawyer is about to lie? His lips start moving....

Q: How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?
A: Cut the rope....

There was a loser who couldn't get a date. He went to a bar and asked this one guy how to get a date...

An investment counsellor went out on her own. She was shrewd and diligent, so business kept comi...

Q: What do you get when you cross the ...

The Pope died and went to heaven. When he got there, he found a lawyer in line in front of him ...

A local United Way office realized that the organization had never received a donation from the town...

There was a loser who couldn't get a date. He went to a bar and asked this one guy how to get a ...

There was a loser who couldn't get a date. He went to a bar and asked this one guy how to get a ...

There was a loser who couldn't get a date. He went to a bar and asked this one guy how to get a ...

Carlson was charged with stealing a Mercedes Benz, and after a long trial, the jury acquitted him. L...

It seems that a lawyer had a little bit too much to drink and on his way home rear-ended the car...

|A Brooklyn lawyer, a used car salesman and a banker were gathered by a coffin containing the body o...

A Brooklyn lawyer, a used car salesman and a banker were gathered by a coffin containing the bod...