lawyer jokes

What is the difference between a lawyer and a sperm?



At least a sperm h...

A certain lawyer was quite wealthy and had a summer house in the country, to which he retreated ...

A lawyer named Strange died, and his friend asked the tombstone maker to inscribe on his tombs...

A priest and a lawyer are walking down the street and seea small boy eating an ice cream. The priest...

A lawyer died and arrived at the pearly gates. To his dismay, there were thousands of people ahe...

A lawyer finds himself in the city park. It is a beautiful summer day so he decides to take his ...

A lawyer walks into a bar and sits down next to a drunk who is closely examining something held ...

On visting a seriously ill lawyer in the hospital, his friend found himsitting up in the bed, franti...

Q. What do lawyers use for birth control?

A. Their personalities.

Q. What...

A dog ran into a butcher shop and grabbed a roast off the counter.

Fortunately, the butc...

A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer ...

A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer ...

A certain lawyer was quite wealthy and had a summer house in the country, to which he retreated ...

These Lawyer jokes are from the Nolo Press newspaper.

What do lawyers use for birt...

An Elderly couple are in the Lawyer's office saying they would like to get a divorce

...

Q. What do lawyers use for birth control?

A. Their personalities.

Q. W...

|What are the three questions most commonly asked by lawyers?1. How much money do you have?2. Where ...

A witness to an automobile accident was testifying. The lawyer asked him, "Did you actually see ...

Storming into his lawyer's office, a Texas oil magnate demanded that divorce proceedings begin a...

|A doctor and a lawyer were attending a cocktail party when the doctor was approached by a man who a...

What do you get a lawyer for his birthday?Briefs!! ha!ha!...

What do you call an honest lawyer? An oxymoron....

What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in wet cement?



Not eno...

A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party. Their conversation was constantly interrupted by peop...

A lawyer and an engineer were fishing in the Caribbean. The lawyer said, "I'm here because my ho...

|A gang of robbers broke into a lawyer's club by mistake. The old legal lions gave them a fight for ...

A gang of robbers broke into a lawyer's club by mistake. The old legal lions gave them a fight f...

Did you hear about the lawyer who was solicited to be a Jehovah's Witness?

He re...

A lawyer and an engineer were fishing in the Caribbean. The lawyer said, "I'm here because my ho...

The guy called up his lawyer to tell him he was suing for divorce, and the lawyer inquired as to...

He tells you that his last good case was a Budweiser.



When the prosecutors ...

It was so cold last winter that I saw a lawyer with his hands in his own pockets.A man walked into a...

A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party.



Their conversation was c...

A lawyer was helping a poor old widow settle her husband's estate. Upon completion of the job, h...

Q: You are stuck in an elevator with a tiger, a lion and a lawyer. You have a ...

One day a man (who hates lawyers)found a lamp along the beach.he rubbed it and a genie popped ou...

Q: If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?
A: It might be your bi...

A lawyer died and arrived at the pearly gates. To his dismay, there were thousands of people ahe...

A very wealthy lawyer retreated for several weeks each year to his summer home in the backwoods ...

Two lawyers walking through the woods spotted a vicious-looking bear.

The first ...

Q: What do you get when you cross a lawyer with a pit bull?

A: A dishonest pit bull....

The staff at a local United Way office realized that it had never received a donation from the t...

There was a job opening in the country's most prestigious law firm and it finally comes down to ...

Q. How do you stop a lawyer from drowning?

A. Shoot him before he hits the water....

What do a lawyer and a sperm have in common?
They both hope to be human someday....

|A very wealthy lawyer retreated for several weeks each year to his summer home in the backwoods of ...

A very wealthy lawyer retreated for several weeks each year to his summer home in the backwoods ...

A lawyer named Strange died, and his friend asked the tombstone maker to inscribe on his tombstone, ...

|A lawyer was driving his big BMW down the highway, singing to himself, "I love my BMW, I love my BM...

A lawyer was driving his big BMW down the highway, singing to himself, "I love my BMW, I love my...