general - unsorted jokes

Yo momma so stupid she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Jif....

The one labeled "IDAHO"....

I never make the same mistake twice--I'm too busy making new ones....

2 pshycologists met each other in a street one day.

One said to the other, "You're g...

Jesus is coming, everyone look busy....

Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctors?
A: Because he was feeling crummy!
...

You don't know?

So you're the one!...

A: That's not funny!!!
...

Have you ever seen an asshole wrapped in plastic?



Just look at your dri...

My friend is so stupid: He sent me a fax with a stamp on it. He thought a quarterback was a refu...

A great Soviet general was once asked by his adjutant, "Comrade General,
what is the mean...

Bill Gates is hanging out with the chairman of General Motors.

"If automotive techno...

The newlyweds were on their honeymoon when the groom asked, "Honey, you can tell me. Am I the fi...

Rick O' Shea....

...the ceremony was OK, but the reception was fabulous...

Q: Why did they kick raggedy ann out of the toy box?

A: Because she was always sittin...

Why did the gum cross the road? -it was stuck to the chickens foot!...

Your so fat when you dived of the diving board the water moved out of the way....

What has 226 teeth and holds back a monster?...

Cauchy - it leaves a residue at every pole....

Q:What do you get when you cross a deer and a pickle togehter?



A:A dilldoe...

Scared the crap out of the dog...

Sell them to HP....

A bingo machine....

What does a short sighted gynecologist and a dog have in common?



They b...

Plane: How do you fly so fast?

Rocket: You'll know when your ass is on fire!...

There are two cows in a field. One says to the other, ''So what do you think of mad cow disease?...

The guy with the recipe graduated.
...

Your momma is like a race car . . .

She burns four rubbers a day.
...

Pumpkin Pi!...

WHY DOES IT MATTER? IT'S JUST GONNA BURN OUT AGAIN, ANYWAY.
...

Q: Why did the blond jump off the bridge?



A: To see if her maxipad rea...

Horn broken, watch for finger....

Wear short sleeves: Support your right to bare arms!...

What's worse than having your doctor tell you that you that you have a sexually transmitted dise...

They know how to make little things count....

Yo mamma's so stupid she got trapped in a bathroom and wet her pants!
...

What does SWM stand for in a personal column advertisement?



Sneaking Wh...

Even the pool table doesn't have balls!...

What do you call a Mexican being baptized?

Bean dip....

So the Germans can march in the shade....

Q: What's the difference between a rectal and oral thermometer? A: The taste....

What is the thing that you keep on looking for and when you find it you throw it away?

They have one-track minds....

You get a slobbering creature who chews up everything and ignores you totally....

Her belly button doesn't have lint, it has sweaters....

None. It should be opened by the time she brings it....

Women always get to clean it...

Q: How to communicate with a fish?

A: Drop him a line!...

When he tells you your wife's hair smells nice....