general - unsorted jokes

Walk him and pitch to the rhino....

Carlsbad Caverns: 22% more cavities....

Because its the only way they can drive with handcuffs on.
...

One, but it will take 4 episodes....

[Ed: These are from 1984, but they still apply ]...

Q:why do the people have heart Attacks?

So you can tell them apart from feminists....

Q: What do the letters D.N.A. stand for?

A: National Dyslexics Association.
...

I absolutley hate sex on the television.....



I keep falling off!...

You are the wind beneath my wings....

Give him a Comapq or an HP....

He worked it out with a pencil....

What do you get when you cross a dog with a telephone?
A golden receiver!...

What goes in hard, and comes out wet and sticky?

Your momma is so fat . . .

She puts mayo on aspirin.
...

Quatro sinko....

If you've got the time, I've got the inclination....

A hamburger!...

Have you ever heard of someone getting a piece of elephant?...

The position of the dirt bag....

What does a nymphomaniac say after she's had sex? Do all you guys play for the same team?...

They get eaten 3 times for a quarter!...

A nervous wreck!...

If I wanted any lip from you, I would jiggle my zipper!...

You boil the hell out of it....

Your momma is so fat that when God made light, he had to ask her to move!...

Why don't witched wear underwear when they fly?...

What do you get when you have 50 politicians and 50 lesbians in a room?



...

a Bjorn-again Christian....

Big holes all over Australia!...

Because deep down, they're really not that bad!
...

They both like a tight seal!...

Because it was a copycat, and it was copying the chicken....

Dear God,

Please grant me patience - NOW!...

What has 18 legs and catches flies?...

Have you ever tried to open a grilled cheese sandwich?...

He lost his bat, man....

They always want to know how to cook food stamps.
...

Make them into a tire and call it a Goodyear....

Second guy: Why doesn't he just buy one? It's faster....

They both go down for the Count....

A brain tumor...

You gotta hand it to her!...

Why do girls have to where a cup when they skydive?



So they dont whistl...

Q: What did Jeffery Dahmer say to Lorena Bobbit??

A: "Are you gonna eat that??"
...

A golden retriever...

He who laughs last thinks slowest....

The Nutquacker!...

Herring aids...

French War Heroes....