Drunks Jokes

A well dressed gentlemen enters the bar of a five star restaurant, sits at the bar and orders four v...

A completely inebriated man was stumbling down the street with one foot on the curb and one foot in ...

A driver, obviously drunk, was heading the wrong way downa one-way street when a policeman pulled hi...

A drunk leaves a bar and decides to take a shortcut througha graveyard. It is raining heavily and ve...

A drunk staggered into a cemetery and fell into a freshly dug grave.Pretty soon a second drunk stagg...

A fellow decides to take off early from work and go drinking. He stays until the bar closes at 2am, ...

A man in a bar sees a friend at a table, drinking by himself.Approaching the friend he comments, "Yo...

A man had been drinking at the bar for hours when he mentioned somethingabout his girlfriend being o...

A pizza was waiting in the stomach to be digested,then suddenly a whiskey came along. Pizza thought:...

A policeman cruising past a pub after closing time notices two motor bikes still parked out the fr...

A somewhat drunk man feels a bald man's head and says,"Say, your head feels just like my wife's ass....

A visiting conventioneer from Saskatchewan walked into a bar in Greenwich Village and sat next to a ...

A woman goes into a bar with a little Chihuahua dog on a leash.She sits down at the bar next to a dr...

After a long pubcrawl those two guys discuss wether the moon is red orgreen. Since they can't come t...

"ALCOHOL KILLS SLOWLY"So what ? Who's in a hurry ?...

At 3 am a desk clerk at a hotel gets a call from a drunk guy askingwhat time the bar opens. "It open...

A very drunk man in a bar tells the bartender and everyone that issitting near him that he can fart ...

Buford: Man, have you got a drinking problem! Mongo: The hell I do! Buford: The hell you don't!Mongo...

Drunk walks into elevator, no elevator there, falls five stories down, lands on the bottom. Lies the...

"Old Jethro's next door's a-makin' moonshine again." the wife told her husband."How can you tell ?" ...

A customer was sitting in a bar having a few drinks when he noticed a tiny little spot on the wall t...

Little old Mr. Ravelli is on his front stoop, barbequeing a chicken on a manual rotisserie. A dr...

McAteer arrived at J.F.K. Airport and wandered about the terminal with tears streaming down his chee...

One day, a Smartie and a Polo were having a drink in the pub.Suddenly the pub door swings open and i...

The scene was Mount Olympus, where Bacchus, the Greek god of wine, had thrown a party for a pair of ...