computer jokes

You're spending a lot of time at that computer screen. Have you had your eyes checked? No, they...

How is a computer like an air conditioner? When you open Windows it won't work!...

Q. How do you know that a blonde's been on the computer using Microsoft Word?

The MCI virus: Every three minutes it reminds you that you're paying too much for the AT&T virus...

my brain is like a computer,

the older I get the less avaliable memory I have....

Q: How many computer studies students does it take to change a lightbulb ?
A: None. They ar...

In Computer Heaven:The management is from Intel,The design and construction is done by Apple,The...

Oprah Winfrey virus: Your 200MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80MB, and then slowly expands bac...

Apparently a computer giant decided to have some parts manufactured in Japan as a trial project....

Dear Dr. RAM
I have a computer with a Pentium 133 CPU. I want to increase the speed, but I ha...

Another Dell customer called to say he couldn''t get his computer to fax anything. After 40 minu...

A customer called to say he couldn't get his computer to fax anything. After 40 minutes of troub...

My son is so lazy he hates emptying the trash in the recycle bin on his computer....

What happened when the computer fell on the floor? It slipped a disk....

The attention span of a computer is as long as its electrical cord....

What do you get if you cross a computer with a ballet dancer? The Netcracker suite....

Why did the duck stick his leg into a computer? He wanted to have webbed feet....

Why did the duck stick his leg into a computer? He wanted to have webbed feet....

Q. What does a blonde and a computer have in common?

A. You don't learn to apprec...

Dot Matrix - Eino Matrix's wife...

Did you hear about the new computer virus?It's called the "Lorena Bobbit Virus".Apparently, it turns...

A beautiful woman asked a computer geek what would be a reasonable password for her new E-Mail. ...

How can you tell if a blonde has been using a computer?The joystick is wet and theres white out on t...

Ted: Last night my computer died. Ned: What did it die of? Ted: Aterminal illness...

Q: What does a proud computer call his little son? A: A microchip off the old block....

Q: What happens if you cross a midget and a computer? A: You get a short circut....

What is an astronaut's favorite key on a computer keyboard? The space bar....

To err is human; but to really mess things up requires a computer....

What do computer experts do at weekends? Go for a disk drive....

What's the difference between your finger and a hammer? I don't know! Well, you're not using m...

Which football team to you need to connect up your computer? Leeds....

Why did the dish and spoon hide their computer? The cat kept fiddling with i.t....

Why do computer teachers never get sick? Because an apple a day keeps the doctor away....

Q: How does a computer tell you it needs more memory? A: It says ''byte me'''...

A: You only have to punch information into a computer once....

PCMCIA: People Can't Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms
ISDN: It Still Does Nothing
APPLE...

A tech support employee once received a call from a disgruntled lady who had purchase one of t...

Young Judy, the editor of a trivia publication, was having trouble with her computer. So she cal...

>From New Scientist, 28 august 93, Feedback column:

"The National Westminster B...

Two priests died at the same time and met Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter said, "I'd ...

Two priests died at the same time and met Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter said, "I'd ...

My computer crashed and died today And I thought, "oh well what the hey" Now I'd have time to clean ...

OCR - Optical Character Recognition

A technology that can take written words and convert ...

Gallup virus: Sixty percent of the PCs infected will lose 38 percent of their data 14 percent of...

Costello: Hey, Abbott!

Abbot: Yes, Lou?

Costello: I just got my first comp...

Tech Support hotlines are not easy work, you get calls from all sorts of idiotic users that appa...

This computer you charged me L950 for doesn't work....and you said it would be trouble free. ...

PCMCIA - People Can't Memorise Computer Industry Acronyms

ISDN - It Still Does Noth...

How can you tell that your blonde secretary has been typing on your computer?White-out on the screen...

Computer science student is studying under a tree and another one pulls up on a flashy new bike ...