aviation jokes

A plane full of retirees headed for Florida was gripped with fear when the pilot announced, "Two...

Newly arrived in the U.S., immigrants Mario and Luigi go to the urban unemployment office.
...

From a Southwest Airlines employee.... "Welcome aboard Southwest Flight XXX to YYY. To operate y...

|"This is Captain Sinclair speaking. On behalf of my crew I'd like to welcome you aboard British Air...

"This is Captain Sinclair speaking. On behalf of my crew I'd like to welcome you aboard British ...

An elderly doctor and a Presbyterian minister were seated next to each other on the plane. The p...

An elderly doctor and a Presbyterian minister were seated next to each other on the plane. The p...

"This is Captain Sinclair speaking. On behalf of my crew I'd like to welcome you aboard British ...

A man is drowning in the sea.''Help me, Lord,'' he cries.



Just then, a fis...

A pilot, the President, Micheal Jackson, a librarian, and some kids are on a plane that is about...

Some time ago, I was taking a ground school class for private pilots.
During the session...

"This is Captain Sinclair speaking. On behalf of my crew I'd like to welcome you aboard British ...

Here's a story, that actually did happen.

On July 2nd 1982, Larry Walters, a truck ...

An airplane was flying from LA to New York. About an hour into the flight, the pilot announced, ...

A plane was taking off from Kennedy. After it reached a comfortable cruising altitude, the cap...

An airline captain was breaking in a very pretty new blonde stewardess. The route they were flyi...

This is a bit of light relief from an internal web site here at
Netscape. Apparently, it...

During WWII a fighter pilot was shot down over Germany and he was captured by the Nazis. He was ...

|An airline captain was breaking in a very pretty new blonde stewardess. The route they were flying ...

On reaching his plane seat a man is surprised to see a parrot strapped in next to him. He asks t...

|On reaching his plane seat a man is surprised to see a parrot strapped in next to him. He asks the ...

On reaching his plane seat a man is surprised to see a parrot strapped in next to him. He asks t...

"This is Captain Sinclair speaking. On behalf of my crew I'd like to welcome you aboard British ...

A plane was taking off from Kennedy Airport. After it reached a comfortable cruising altitude, t...

An airline captain was breaking in a very pretty new blonde stewardess. The route they were flyi...

A farmer and his wife went to a fair. The farmer was fascinated by the airplanes and asked a pil...

|In the early 1930's, a farmer and his wife went to a fair. The farmer was fascinated by the airplan...

In the early 1930's, a farmer and his wife went to a fair. The farmer was fascinated by the airp...

An employee of USAir with the last name of Gay boarded a USAir flight with a free travel vouch...

A blonde gets an opportunity to fly to a nearby country. She has never been on an airplane any...

|A blonde gets an opportunity to fly to a nearby country. She has never been on an airplane anywhere...

|At the airport for a business trip, I settled down to wait for the boarding announcement at Gate 35...

At the airport for a business trip, I settled down to wait for the boarding announcement at Gate...

At the airport for a business trip, I settled down to wait for the boarding announcement at Gate...

It seems that a young man volunterred for military service during
World War II. He had su...

In the early 1930's, a farmer and his wife went to a fair. The farmer was fascinated by the airp...

|A blonde went to a flight school insisting that she wanted to learn to fly. As all the planes were ...

Taken from this mornings "Metro" (7th June, London, UK):

A friendly greeting caused...

A photographer for a national magazine was assigned to take pictures of a great forest fire. He ...

It was a "No Frills" airline:

• They didn't sell tickets, they sold chances

A farmer and his wife went to a county fair and were fascinated by a barnstorming pilot who was ...

A farmer and his wife went to a county fair and were fascinated by a barnstorming pilot who was ...

Bush, Jean Chretien, the Pope and an eight year old girl are in a plane. Suddenly, the pilot say...

The German controllers at Frankfurt Airport were often short-tempered. They not only expected yo...

A pilot and a co-pilot were descending for a landing at an airport they had never been to before...

A pilot and a co-pilot were descending for a landing at an airport they had never been to before...

There were three guys in an airplane. One guy dropped a rock, another dropped a brick, and the ...

A Mexican newspaper reports that bored Royal Air Force pilots stationed on the Falkland Islands ...

U.S.Air: When you just can't wait for the world to come to you.
U.S.Air: We're Amtrak with...

One day at school, the teacher was talking to the class about there parent's occupations.
...