animal world

Make the world your playground.
Whenever you miss the sandbox, cover it up. Dragging a so...

Upon entering the little country store, the stranger noticed a sign sayingDANGER! BEWARE OF DOG! pos...

A travelling salesman stopped alongside a field on a country road to rest a few minutes.The man had ...

There were three drunk guys and they got in a car accident. They go to heaven and plead god for ...

A man takes his sick dog to the vet. The vet lifts the dog ontothe the operating table, looks down a...

Q: Why don't elephants use cellular phones?A: So the rest of the world won't know their plans....

Two men were walking along the street when they cameupon a dog licking his dick.One man said, "I sur...

Q: What has four legs and eight arms?A: A pit-bull terrier at a children's play area....

What are the five reasons for not wanting to be an egg ? 1) You only get laid once. 2) You only ...

One day the teacher decides to play an animal game. She holds up a picture of a giraffe and asks if ...

What's brown and crispy on the outside, and white and creamy on the inside? A c...

There were two cows in a paddock, enjoying the sun and eating some grass. The first cow said "Moo."A...

What do you call a dog with no legs?Hehe...it doen't matter, it's not going to come anyway!Sent by M...

What is the last thing to go through the mindof a mosquito when it hits your windscreen?It's ass....

What do you get when you cross a Rooster with an owl?A Cock that can stay up all night!!...

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says: "So, why the long face?"...

How do you make a cat drink?1 cat2 lemonsVodkaMix then serve...

What did the elephant say to the naked man?That's cute, but can it pick up peanuts!...

Two goldfish are in a tank.One said to the other:'Do you know how to drive this thing?'Sent by Clair...

What does an elephant keep up its trunk?A Yard 'n' half o' snot!...

If a four-legged animal is a quadruped and a two-legged animal is a biped, What's a tiger ? A ...

How to Hunt Elephants -- QA StyleQuality assurance inspectors ignore the elephants and lookfor mista...

What did one Lesbian Frog say to the other? Gee, we really do taste like chicken....

Why does a cow wear a bell?Because his horns are broke!...

First snake:I hope I'm not poisonous.Second snake:Why?First snake:Because I bit my lip!...

Why does a dog lick his balls? Because he can't make a fist....

What do you do when a Rottweiler gets amorous on your leg?Fake an orgasm....

Why does an elephant have four feet?Because it would look silly with six inches....

There were two guys walking down the streetand they saw a dog licking his nuts.One of the guys said....

During an auction of exotic pets, a woman who had placeda winning bid told the auctioneer, "I'm payi...

What's the only animal that has to be oiled? A mouse. Why? 'Cause it squeaks!...

A woman went to a podiatrist complaining that her feet always hurt.He immediately noticed that she w...

The Americans and Russians at the height of the arms race realized that if they continued in the...

Wife comes home to find the old man humping the dog in the front room. "My God Henry", she screa...

Two guys were out hunting, but they weren't getting any ducks. "What do you think the problem is?" o...

An old lady owned two monkeys. One day they both died,so she took them to the taxodermist."So you wa...

|The Americans and Russians at the height of the arms race realized that if they continued in the us...

The Americans and Russians at the height of the arms race realized that if they continued in the...

What has two grey legs and two brown legs?An elephant with diarrhea.What do you give an elephant wit...

Two cows were talking in the field one day.First Cow: Have you heard about the Mad Cow disease that'...

The Americans and Russians at the height of the arms race realized that if they continued in the...

A man took his Rottweiler to the vet and said "My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for...

How do you get an elephant out of the water?Wet.How do you get two elephants out of the water?One by...

Where do you find a no legged dog?Right where you left him....

Why do elephants have 4 feet? -Because 4 inches isn't enough....

What has two legs and bleeds? Half a dog....

What does an elephant use as a vibrator? An epilectic....

Why do gorillas have big noses? Because they have big finger...

What does the snail say when he gets on the turtle?"Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!"...

What is grey and comes in quarts?An Elephant....